Devotionals

perception, provision, scripture, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Perception: Reading Psalm 23 Without the Filter of Circumstance

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 24, 2018January 13, 2019

We respond to Scripture based on how we perceive the goings on in our life. That is one of the beauties of God’s Word; it becomes new each day just as our circumstances and moods do. It’s a lifelong process to take God at His word and not allow perception to filter out the truth.

A dear sister recently told me she is not a fan of Psalm 23. I got the feeling she felt bad about admitting it since it’s part of the Bible, but her reasoning made perfect sense.

After a little inquiry, I learned it was the chapter she was forced to read and recite when she got in trouble as a child. So it’s not hard to see how one of the most well-known passages in Scripture became tarnished in her mind. Let’s dig into Psalm 23 together and see what it says and how it may challenge our perception.

The Lord is my shepherd; there is nothing I lack.

Psalm 23:1

Our Perception

Two specific thoughts come to my mind after reading verse one:

Do I view God as my personal Shepherd, or is He too busy with more important tasks?
What do I perceive I am lacking?

In this passage, God presents Himself as a caretaker. He is seen as a provider, a leader, and One who is responsible for care. Because of that fact, David’s response is: there is nothing I lack. The first part of verse one speaks to God’s character. I wonder what causes us to feel He is holding out on us? Lately, a bit of careful reflection will quickly illuminate I have everything I need.

For example, a few weeks ago our kitchen was wrecked after a weekend of grilling out with neighbors and running around town. No one wanted to clean up the mess. My man is an excellent helper around the house, but he was working late and I needed to clean up before I had room to cook. Has anyone else encountered this yucky phenomenon?

Anyway, as I dove into the mountain I asked God to help me see the positive instead of feeling sorry for myself that no one was helping me. The Father quickly reminded me of the sweet time we had spent with our neighbors and the laundry list of blessings which made it possible. And He showed me what a joy it is to have a family and a home to share. Before I knew it, I was actually smiling while washing dishes. But don’t spread that around… 😉

God’s Provision

He lets me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He renews my life; He leads me along the right paths.

Psalm 23:2-3

Three more reflections appear to me here:

Green pastures mean God knows where the food is.
Quiet waters represent that God knows we are like sheep.
Comfort is always going to be greater on God’s path.

Sometimes, our perception tells us something looks really tantalizing, or maybe even righteous. Yet the Father, in His omniscience, knows what will nourish us completely. If sheep are steered to rushing waters they will stick their head in and be swept downstream. God understands what His children need and how best to provide for them.

That means, if we truly accept that He knows best and does provide for us, then we must dare to challenge beliefs that set themselves against God’s goodness to us. Sheep may lack water and be willing to go toward a stream to quench their thirst, but they may be pulled under rushing waters. The Good Shepherd will always lead us to quiet waters, even if it means we have to walk away from a seemingly sure thing.

His purposes are better than ours, and therefore His paths are better than ours.

-Jeremy Pierre, Author & Dean of Students at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary

Sometimes, our perception tells us something looks really tantalizing, or maybe even righteous. Yet the Father, in His omniscience, knows what will nourish us completely. Click To Tweet

God’s Presence

Even when I go through the darkest valley, I fear no danger, for You are with me. Your rod and Your staff—they comfort me.

Psalm 23:4

Two big things stand out:

There’s no question of if we will go through dark times; it’s merely a question of when.
Yet God is present in the darkness.

In verse 4, David is allowing his understanding of God’s nearness and comfort to guide his perception of a truly agonizing situation. There are times in life when we feel such thick darkness we can practically taste it. Normally that causes fear. But God is with you. He is with me. Darkness and death cannot separate us from the love of God, so in reality, it can do no infinite harm. It may trifle with our body, but it cannot touch the souls of the children of God. We are secure through Christ Jesus.

God’s Attention

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Only goodness and faithful love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in house of the Lord as long as I live.

Psalm 23:5-6

Two observations:

God hosted David on the battlefield in the face of his biggest threat.
David has the assurance of complete rest in God’s steadfast love.

In this last stanza, David shifts the descriptive symbols used for God. He went from describing God as Shepherd in verses 1-4 to a Host in verses 5-6. God lavishes us with His individual attention and exclusive exaltation. He can do that because He’s God! And because the things that concern us concern the Father.

A Few Questions

How would it change your life to believe God “leaves the 99” to find you (Luke 15:4)?
What is the thing you feel you’re lacking or desiring that you don’t have?
Do you believe you can continually leave your desires at the feet of Jesus because He cares for you (Philippians 4:6-7) and will fulfill His purpose for you (Psalm 138:8)?

I hope this encourages your heart and has sparked some rich thoughts about our Good Shepherd and Host. My personal journal is being filled to the brim as I read the beautiful Word of God. It is all at once penetrating and comforting my soul.

All scripture is referenced from the HCSB version of the Bible.

forgiveness, grace, mercy, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Mercy: Receiving and Giving Forgiveness For Our Offenses

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 23, 2018January 13, 2019

Not all of our offenses result in punishment. Sometimes we receive mercy instead. When we experience grace and mercy, we can extend it to others.

It never fails. Something catastrophic always happens when my husband leaves town, and he leaves town kinda frequently. Hmm… Maybe it’s not when he leaves town. Maybe it’s just all the time. Or maybe I’m being a bit dramatic. Nah. That couldn’t possibly be it. This was definitely catastrophic, and it was when my husband was gone. Therefore, one must naturally conclude that this is just how it is.

I wish I could change the names in this story in order to protect the innocent, but that is not possible since it’s about my oldest son and myself. That poor child. Actually, my heart has a special affection for all oldest children. Truly. And this is coming from a youngest child. So, since I cannot hide the characters in this story, I shall hide the offense. It is, after all, his testimony to tell when he is ready to do so.

The offense…

We were cleaning up dinner on the fifth and final night that my husband was gone. My oldest son, out of the blue, began to make a sound that was a mix between a moan and a squeal. I had no idea what was happening. “Talk to me! What is wrong??” He replies with, “There’ll never be a good time to tell you, so…” And he proceeds to tell me about a sneaky thing he had been doing.

In that moment, the Holy Spirit took over my body. That is the only way to explain my response. My typical response is to express anger, raise my voice, and flail my arms. Honesty here. I’m a yeller. However, in this moment of him confessing, I simply began to weep.

This is not, I believe, the response he was expecting, but it was the response that allowed him the freedom to continue. Oh yes, continue he did. The depth of the offense was revealing itself, and with each new level, more tears were flowing.

The forgiveness…

When we finally came to the bottom of the pit he was in, I told him he needed to ask God for forgiveness. “I did,” he said. Ok, good. Then I say with a shaky voice, “You need to ask for forgiveness from me.”

He sat there, sobbing, breathing hard, for several moments. I could see the battle brewing within him; the struggle of pride versus humility. I did not rush him. This is a battle that is hard to fight through, and no one else can fight it. On this day, humility won out. “I’m so sorry.”

“And I forgive you,” came my immediate reply. But it was his response that will forever be etched in my heart: “But I don’t deserve it.” Reliving it, right now, in this moment, I can just start sobbing all over again. I pulled him into my arms and said, “Oh baby, none of us do. That is the point.”

The need…

My son is a good kid. He mostly does the right thing. He is kind and compassionate. The problem with being a good kid is that: a) they think they are always a good kid and become arrogant, and b) no, wait… “a” pretty much covers it. Arrogance leads to thinking we don’t need forgiveness. And if we don’t need forgiveness, then we don’t need Christ.

Even though my heart was broken that night, I was also rejoicing. Now, he understands his need for forgiveness, and what a gift grace and mercy are. He also knows (because the Holy Spirit took over my body and made me respond calmly – seriously, I take no credit here) that he can come to us and we will love him through whatever mess he is in. We are not accepting the mess, but we are accepting him.

My offense…

Oh, how I wish I could just share this story about my son and wrap it up with a nice little bow. But that wouldn’t be real. That would be me putting pretty packaging on a pile of poo. Sorry, if that’s too graphic, but that is how I felt a few weeks ago. Like a pile of poo.

It was, you got it… when my husband was out of town (I mean seriously, this is starting to become an issue). My neighborhood had just experienced a great tragedy, and I was a little neurotic with wanting to make sure everyone I love was safe. So when I couldn’t find my boys one night, I went berserk. Crazy. Nut-so.

I calmly walked up the street to the house they had been playing at; they weren’t there. Next, I blew the whistle (it’s this super loud one my husband uses to call the boys home – I hate it and only use it if I have to); they didn’t respond. I looked in the backyard, came inside; no sign of them. Then I walked to the other end of the street; not there either. It was officially time to panic.

Breathing deeply, I came in the house preparing to call all my neighbors, only to notice their shoes sitting by the back door. What. The. Heck. I yell their names, and they respond, “Yes ma’am??” Oh no! Don’t you go being all polite and good, I’m about to go ballistic!

My forgiveness…

No sense it airing out the full stink of my poo, so let’s just say I did not handle the fact that my kids were fine after I thought they had been abducted, in a rejoiceful way. We all sat hugging and crying for quite some time. I never have to worry about my kids thinking I’m perfect. Many times I have shown them how to ask for forgiveness with teaching by example. Sigh.

As my boys were getting into bed, I reminded my oldest (that dear dear child) of when he expressed to me that he did not deserve my forgiveness. With puffy red eyes, I said, “I understand how you felt. And I am in awe of God’s forgiveness, and grace, and mercy.”

But you, O Lord, are a God of compassion and mercy,
slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love and faithfulness.

Psalm 86:15, NLT

My need…

I have heard it said that those who receive grace, are able to extend grace to others. This is also true for mercy and forgiveness. I too have been the “good girl” falling into the trap of believing I have my act together and don’t need help from others, or from God.

Oh, but I so do! Moments like this, where I fall so hard on my face that it feels like I’ve busted out all my teeth, are a gut-punch reality check. My need for a Savior is so great. Not so I can get stronger, or have all the answers, but so I can remember that His strength is the only strength I can rely on. And by remembering this I can be the hands and feet of Christ, loving others, lifting them, pointing them to the only One who can truly remove our ~~transgressions~~ poo. And stinky poo it is, indeed.

Our need for a Savior is so great. Not so we can get stronger, or have all the answers, but so we can remember that His strength is the only strength we can rely on. Click To Tweet

beloved, chosen, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Beloved: Accepting Our Position As Dear to God’s Heart

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 22, 2018January 13, 2019

The words “chosen” and “beloved” can feel like a foggy memory from a story about someone else we vaguely remember. The Truth is, we are His beloved.

For the past few months, I have been doing a personal 8-week Bible study on Ephesians…I’m in week 3. (Don’t judge me). If you read my last devotional you are aware that I’ve had a few things going on in my life. Some days, finding my way to the study book, itself, has proven a monumental challenge. Believe me, sensing my beloved factor has hardly been on the radar!

“Christian” Mantra

This particular Bible study is written by the English professor, Heather Holleman. She took seven important verbs from the book of Ephesians and showed how they can be transformational in our lives. She used words like included, chosen, seated, renewed.

Well, I can’t just fly through each chapter and expect it to be transformative, can I? Apparently, I didn’t think so, because I parked for weeks in Chapter 2 with chosen. But why? This is elementary school material for Christians, isn’t it?

Perhaps. However, I have found that Christians of all denominational persuasions are very adept at parroting the mantra of “forgiven, chosen, loved,” but secretly wonder what the heck God was thinking when (or if?!) He called them. (You’ve known a few of those folks.)

There are days…dark seasons of disappointment, depression or loss, when I wonder, too. The words chosen and beloved can feel like a foggy memory from a story about someone else I vaguely remember…

Beloved Sweetness

About 30 years ago, I was introduced to my first book by Henri Nouwen. A quote from the book appeared in the newsletter of a Baptist evangelist my husband and I followed. His words so arrested me that I clearly recall where I was standing in our then-kitchen when I read them. They rooted me to the floor as I absorbed them and tasted their sweetness within my spirit.

I have been wondering if there might be one word I would most want you to remember when you finished reading all I wish to say… It is the word “Beloved,” …

Yes, there is that voice, the voice that speaks from above and from within and that whispers softly or declares loudly: “You are my Beloved, on you my favor rests.”

Henri J.M. Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World

Having been raised in a dysfunctional family, and attending a church that talked grace, but walked works, I had never, ever heard this message of being God’s Beloved. I’d like to be able to herald that I jumped immediately on the train of the beloved and sang it loudly from every pulpit of my life. It would be sheer joy to share that I gathered broken women around me, others who had never known the inner warmth of being cherished or chosen, and invited them to journey with me on this captivating road called Beloved…

Gather those who are broken and never knew the warmth of being cherished or chosen, and invite them to journey on the road towards God's beloved children. Click To Tweet

Striking Chords

But alas, I did not. An introvert at heart, I held this treasure closely. With no personal teacher to walk with me, and inner tapes or lies quick to point out my failings, I embarked on a circuitous sojourn. I read many books, studied under several Bible teachers, then went to a Bible college.

Afterward, I stretched outside my own denominational background. It involved enrolling in an MA program that was offered from the local Presbyterian seminary in conjunction with a nearby Catholic College. So, you can imagine how challenging that was for a Southern Baptist girl! The debates between us were wonderful, and many of us remained friends!

However, sadly, my formal, theological education did not teach about being beloved. But, don’t misunderstand, I received the intellectual knowledge that God loved me, John 3:16, etc. Somehow, that didn’t pierce through the self-hate and inner lies that mocked me so often as the passage from Nouwen’s book did…being beloved struck a deeper chord within me.

Beloved is someone who is greatly loved and dear to the heart. This term is used in 90 verses within 29 books of the Bible, especially found in the King James or English Standard Versions. Why, I wonder, aren’t these pointed out more where they concern God’s people?

In love, he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.

Ephesians 1:5-6, ESV

Lies of the World

If we come to Christ and aren’t discipled well, or we are in a church that doesn’t teach much about God’s cleansing grace and unimaginable love, then it’s understandable when we struggle accepting being chosen or beloved. In fact, we continue to live under the power of the lies of this world…which are murderous.

The world tells you many lies about who you are, and you simply have to be realistic enough to remind yourself of this. Every time you feel hurt, offended, or rejected, you have to dare to say to yourself: ‘These feelings, strong as they may be, are not telling me the truth about myself. The truth, even though I cannot feel it right now, is that I am the chosen child of God, precious in God’s eyes, called the Beloved from all eternity, and held safe in an everlasting belief.’

Henri J.M. Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World

Overcoming

Don’t believe for a minute this is a new thing; the enemy has been lying to us since the Garden! Charles Spurgeon wrote about it in his devotional, (taken from his sermons,) Morning and Evening, published in 1869. Slog through the old English for a minute; it’s worth it!

Rejoice then, believer, in this: thou art accepted “in the beloved.” Thou lookest within, and thou sayest, “There is nothing acceptable here!” But look at Christ, and see if there is not everything acceptable there. Thy sins trouble thee; but God has cast thy sins behind His back, and thou art accepted in the Righteous One. Thou hast to fight with corruption, and to wrestle with temptation, but thou art already accepted in Him who has overcome the powers of evil. The devil tempts thee; be of good cheer, he cannot destroy thee, for thou art accepted in Him who has broken Satan’s head. Know by full assurance thy glorious standing. Even glorified souls are not more accepted than thou art. They are only accepted in heaven “in the beloved,” and thou art even now accepted in Christ after the same manner.

Imagine, even angels in heaven cannot experience the full acceptance and sense of being cherished as we, God’s Beloved.

You are His Beloved; on you, His favor rests.

Amen.

comfort, trust, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, Spiritual Growth

Comfort: Learning Who to Trust Will Transform Our Lives

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 18, 2018January 13, 2019

Trust can be extremely difficult. But, drawing close to God can truly bring us out of our comfort zones and into the comfort of His faithfulness.

“If you behave, you’ll get some candy.”

We’ve all probably used some form of blackmail. Especially if you’re a parent. Most of the time it can be harmless, but what about when it crosses the line?

“If you don’t start behaving the way we want you to, we’re going to give you up for adoption.”

Sadly, all trust was broken when these words fell on little ears.

Trust is the glue that holds relationships together and when trust is broken, so is the relationship.

I’ve struggled to really trust people in my life. Seems like I’ve been trying to live up to everyone’s expectations because if I didn’t, they might walk away.

Earthly Trust

The definition of trust is the firm belief in the reliability of someone (Merriam-Webster).

Firm can be defined as solidly fixed. I think of “Gorilla Glue”: nothing is breaking apart what has been put together.

Sadly, most of us can agree that this type of trust is not of Earth. Living in a fallen world equals a lack of trustworthy humans. This makes any relationship daunting and even a little scary.

And, if you’ve experienced painful disappointment, you will attest to this; trusting in God can be hard.

We know we should do it, but it’s tough to put that much confidence in someone else. Perhaps you ask yourself how you can surrender it all to God when everything else in your life seems unstable and unreliable.

The fact is, we are surrounded by other broken humans. It can be difficult when all we hear them say is “the Lord is always faithful”.

Here’s the thing: we said trust is a glue to hold our relationships together. So if we don’t have some confidence in others, we won’t have satisfying relationships and we won’t be able to step out into greater things.

Comfort Zone

The same is true of God. We can’t grow in faith without beginning to trust Him. When we’re afraid to be “all in” with Him and trust Him completely, we will never achieve what His desires are for us.

We will remain in our comfort zone without growing in a relationship with God, fulfilling our purpose, or even having rewarding earthly relationships.

When Jesus appeared walking on the Sea of Galilee to the disciples, Peter called out.

Then Peter called to him, “Lord, if it’s really you, tell me to come to you, walking on the water.”

“Yes, come,” Jesus said.

So Peter went over the side of the boat and walked on the water toward Jesus. But when he saw the strong wind and the waves, he was terrified and began to sink. “Save me, Lord!” he shouted.

Jesus immediately reached out and grabbed him. “You have so little faith,” Jesus said. “Why did you doubt me?”

Matthew 14:28-31, NLT

Trust Recognized

See how Peter asked Jesus to invite him, extending his trust, and stepping out? Then once he was on the water, he started to think of reasons why he shouldn’t trust and he started to sink; back into his comfort zone.

Sound familiar?

Trusting completely in someone is scary when all we’ve known is uncertainty.

Jesus then told Peter he had too little trust.

Peter’s comfort was the boat. Instead of reaching out to Jesus and allowing God to stay beside him, he sank. What if Peter would have remembered how faithful Jesus had already been in his life?

The key is focusing on Christ. God is always faithful, certain, stable, and steadfast.

When we ask God to grow our trust in Him, it will extend to our other relationships, and give us the confidence to leave our comfort zones.

Peter went on to be known as “The Rock” the early church was built on, just two short chapters later. If Peter was able to grow in trust, we know by following our Lord, we can be blessed with increased trust also.

When we ask God to help us trust in Him, it will extend to our other relationships, and give us the confidence to leave our comfort zones. Click To Tweet

Growing Comfortable in Trust…

Remain close to God through daily reading of His word.

Review God’s track record from the Bible.

Remove ourselves from the situation. (We’re sinful and can’t even trust ourselves).

Remember God is our source of blessings and life.

Rest in God. He can take our past, heal us and give us a future.

This girl with trust issues knows that she’s not where she once was, but she hasn’t arrived yet either. After reading Peter’s transformation, I know God can use even the pain of my past to drive me from my comfort zone to an always faithful Christ.

Julie Loos is the mom of 5 kids and has been happily married to Greg for 19 years. She loves to read, eat chocolate, drink iced tea and spend time writing in the midst of messes.

You can connect with Julie on her blog unmaskingthemess.com, on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.

bravery, fear, trust, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Afraid: Trusting in God to Overcome Fear and Turn it into Bravery

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 17, 2018January 13, 2019

Fear plays out in different ways for different people. How we respond to being afraid matters and can set the precedent for how we live our lives: timid or brave.

Fear has played an active role in my life for as long as I can remember. Fear of failure, afraid of being alone, fearful of the future. I lived in a state of constantly being afraid of what people thought of me and what could go wrong in certain situations. As the years went by I continued to be fearful, but made every effort to pretend that I wasn’t.

Recently this theme of fear and what it should look like has been popping up in my life. From songs I would hear on the radio, to the devotions I was doing, to the books I was required to read for work. They each spoke about fear in a unique way but there was a constant theme. God is obviously trying to teach me a valuable lesson about fear: fear is a liar, and fear is normal.

Fear is a Liar

One of the first things I noticed about God’s lesson on fear and its impact on my life was that fear is a liar. There is a song that is literally called “Fear is a Liar” by Zach Williams. I first heard this song when I was deciding whether or not to start sharing my story in a more public form by writing. If that isn’t clarity I don’t know what is.

Fear’s lies play out in different ways for different people. For me, the lies of fear took form in telling me that I shouldn’t do this and that I was not good enough. For others, it may come in the form of comparison…

“She has it more together than I do”

“They are happier than I am.”

“She is prettier than I am.”

These are all lies that stem from fear. The fear that we are not enough. That is a lie.

The Lie over the Call

For some of us, it may manifest itself in our actions. Fear lies to us and tells us that we can’t do it and that we are going to fail. We listen to that voice and ignore God’s call in our life.

For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline

2 Timothy 1:7, NLT

The lie says be afraid and be timid but the truth says that we are full of power, love, and self-discipline. Scripture is clear that God did not call us to be fearful and timid. We need to take charge of our thoughts and actions and replace the lies with the truth found in God’s word.

When we learn to replace the lies with the truth we can be rid of that fearful and timid spirit. We can find joy in God’s plan and purpose in our life.

Fear lies and it destroys. We all feel fear but at the end of the day, we need to place our trust and anxiety on our creator and protector.

Fear lies and it destroys. We all feel fear but at the end of the day, we need to place our trust and anxiety on our creator and protector. Click To Tweet

Fear is Normal

Another truth I found during the journey that God has been taking me on is that fear is normal. We are going to feel fear, but the change happens when we move forward in spite of our fear. Ann Voskamp says it well in her book The Way of Abundance, “Fear can be what we feel, but brave is what we do.” We all feel afraid at times but we need to take hold of that fear and turn it into bravery.

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.

Psalm 56:3, ESV

This scripture tells us we will be afraid, but it doesn’t stop there. It tells us what to do in response to fear: put our trust in Him. He is our provider, our protector, and our constant source of strength. When we put our trust in him it turns our fear into action which results in power, love, and self-discipline.

When thinking about the normalcy of fear and how we will inevitably feel it, I like to think about what Jesus may have been feeling in the Garden of Gethsemane. Scripture tells us that he was in anguish “greatly distressed and troubled”. In such turmoil that His sweat had turned to blood. While scripture does not say that Jesus was afraid, it is clear that he asked God the Father to “remove this cup from me”. How would you feel if you were facing death and separation from God? Jesus didn’t stop there though. He continues, “Yet not what I will, but what you will” (Mark 14:36).

Jesus Afraid?

Jesus puts His trust in God and believed that what He willed was best. He persevered, He conquered. He did not let fear or anguish or turmoil stop Him. And because Jesus did, we are able to have a personal relationship with God. We are able to receive the gift of eternal life.

And he took with him Peter and James and John and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And he said to them “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch. And going a little farther he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said “Abba, Father all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will”.

Mark 14:34-36, ESV

We all feel afraid at times but the difference comes with what we do with that fear. This requires us to make a choice. We can choose to allow that fear to cripple us and stop us from pursuing God’s perfect plan in our life, or we can put our trust in our perfect God and overcome our fear turning it into bravery. God has the ability to rid us of our fear. That can only happen when we actively choose to put our trust in Him and His perfect will.

purge, build, junk, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Purge: Valuing God’s Treasure and Letting Go of Our Own

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 16, 2018January 13, 2019

So often, we place a higher value on the “things” we possess than what they deserve. When we fail to purge our lives of the temporary treasure, we can’t grasp the eternal treasure God has in store for us.

Purge… I LOVE this word! I love the action, I love the freedom and clarity. I’ve mentioned before that I have moved around 9-10 times in my adult life. As you can imagine, all the moves allowed for tons of opportunities to purge. I think I’m an expert now. I’m for sure an expert now…

The Great Purge

I recently took a trip back home. Again. This time it was to fulfill a promise. A promise to clean out 32 years of stuff from the basement of my childhood home. It’s no coincidence, this is the exact amount of time my parents have been married. They haven’t moved from the place their adventure began. So, not many opportunities to exterminate unneeded “stuff”.

Now, in my parents’ defense, not everything was theirs. A majority of the load was stored from my late Grandmother’s time spent living with us. And, all five of us had boxes mixed in with it. So. Many. Boxes. The common question over the three days of cleaning was…

Why in the world did we keep this??

Building Stuff

By day three, I have to be honest, that question had a couple expletives added. Understandably. We were all over it. Over the mess. Over the work. And, over the junk. We donated a lot of items, the dump got its fill, and recycling was overflowing.

We rummaged through boxes of books, files, notes, STUFF. But, not everything was junk. Tucked away within the mountain of STUFF, we found family treasures. We had no idea these items were there, stuffed between the mass amounts of notes my Grandmother took and boxes upon boxes of personal files. You know…now useless. But how much STUFF did we have to sort through before we could find the treasure??

Rummaging the Mess

Manual labor has a way of clearing the mind. At least for me. I can get a lot of thinking done when my hands are busy. So, thoughts upon thoughts flooded my mind in the silence of purging…

There’s a lesson in all of this…

What am I holding on to that isn’t necessary? Where is it stored?

Will my children know what Jesus TRULY means to me, without having to rummage through boxes of Bible study notes when I’m dead?

How far do people have to rummage through my mess to find the treasure of Jesus? Does my life clearly reflect Jesus and His teachings? Or, is He stored under a pile of what I deem worthy?

Are all those “things” stored away in drawers and closets, really doing me any good? Is my home, if the doors aren’t freely opened and the food not freely given, really an offering to the Lord?

Is my example showing my love for God over the love of THINGS?

Human Treasure

I can’t say, with confidence, a solid “Yes” to that last question. It’s no secret these last few months have been tough, financially. I’ve demanded my heart to have faith under pressure…but it failed. I failed. Discontentment, anger, resentment, selfishness, obsessions pile over my true Treasure. Layers upon layers have formed above my Savior. Now, He’s tucked away in a damp, dark, somewhat dusty corner of my “basement heart”…

The NEED to have money in the bank to feel secure, is really what it boils down to, and that’s pretty ugly.

The closer I get to things being yanked from me, the tighter I grasp them. To the point of bleeding. I found myself screaming, crying, and throwing a right nice temper tantrum at my husband. I cut my marriage, my family, and my home wide open.

How foolish. In a second, it can all come crumbling down just like it did for Job. The economy, my bank account, the house, the cars… everything. Not a single thing this world can offer is constant, never changing, eternal. Not. A. Single. Thing.

Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.

Job 1:22, ESV

And yet, I hold on tight to earthly treasure and overrule my only true Portion and Supply.

In a second, it can all come crumbling down just like it did for Job. The economy, the bank account, the house, the cars... everything. Not a single thing this world can offer is constant, never changing, eternal. Click To Tweet

Kingdom Treasure

Man will always fail, paper will always burn, metal will deteriorate and rust over time. The only things of value are what we store up where man can’t reach…

Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.

Matthew 6:19-21, NLT

Sell your possessions and give to those in need. This will store up treasure for you in heaven! And the purses of heaven never get old or develop holes. Your treasure will be safe; no thief can steal it and no moth can destroy it.

Luke 12:33, NLT

Please don’t take me wrong, there are items that are memories and worthy of the spot they take up in my home. I’m also not going to open the can of worms that some believe, “if you’re a Christian, you have to be poor”. But, I will say this, when we possess without pouring our love to the One who supplied, we might as well have nothing.

Our hands and hearts should stay continuously open. All we have, hope to have, and will have can only be supplied and given by our Father. Our treasure lies in God and the only way to store Him up, is to purge all our humanness at the feet of Jesus. Our hands become His hands, our hearts become His heart.

faith, joy, trust, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Sweetness: Tasting His Presence Through the Process

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 15, 2018January 13, 2019

Sometimes faith is a process, or promises take a while to come true. In the place of waiting, the sweetness of the Presence of the Lord sustains us.

One of my favorite things about fall is all the delicious smells and tastes in the air. I love a mouthwatering apple cobbler; a buttery crust, topped with warm gooey cinnamon coated apples. Or what about the rich, cool pumpkin pie. All the flavors culminate into a swirl of delight for your taste buds, like a circus in your mouth. I also love sipping on fresh, warm, apple cider. So sweet. And satisfying.

Think about your favorite dessert right now. You can stop and close your eyes to really experience the sweetness in your mind. Let the warm chocolate spill over your tongue. Let the rich, cool cream melt in your mouth, or the juicy berries explode with flavor into your cheeks. Do you have your special dessert in mind? Meditate on the sweetness for a moment. Let it permeate your senses.

The Sweetness of His Presence

What is better than even the richest dessert, is the full, rich, beautiful presence of Jesus. In His presence is the fullness of joy! It is sweet and satisfying. There is nothing like it in Heaven or on Earth.

The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep, inner] meaning.

Psalm 25:14, AMPC

But, what about when you don’t feel the sweetness? What about when trusting in God, drawing near to Him is painful, difficult, uncomfortable?

There are days when I feel too raw or too ashamed to come close to Jesus. There are times when I don’t understand my own heart, so I don’t want to share it with the God, who sees all. Sometimes I would rather just binge watch TV and let my brain and my heart rest.

Yet, when I choose to risk time with Him, I am never disappointed. Because Jesus isn’t waiting to catch me in a trap. He is my refuge.

O taste and see that the Lord [our God] is good! Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) is the man who trusts and takes refuge in Him.

Psalm 34:8, AMPC

There are days we feel too raw or too ashamed to come close to Jesus. But, when we choose to risk time with Him, we will never be disappointed. Jesus isn't waiting to catch us in a trap. He is our refuge. Click To Tweet

Faith is a Process

I was struck the other day while reading the book of Exodus, by the process of faith. God appears to Moses in a burning bush (the bush is on fire, but not burning up). He tells Moses how He plans to rescue the Israelite people from slavery and that Moses will lead this rescue. God gives Moses the step by step plan for all the He is going to do, and all that Moses is responsible for (Exodus 3-4).

Then, Moses begins to question God. “But I’m not…enough.” “I can’t…succeed.” God provides answers and assurance. Moses continues to make excuses to the point that the Bible says “the anger of the Lord blazed against Moses (Exodus 4:14).” Yet, God still chose Moses to carry out His plan.

And later, in the book of Hebrews, God honors Moses for his faith in rescuing the people of Israel (Hebrews 11:27-29).

How often am I like Moses, asking God the “what about?” questions?

God is extremely gracious, patient and forgiving. He sees the full picture. He loves us through our trials, and questions, and brings us to His place of faith for us. Faith is not something man invented, it is God created.

looking unto Jesus the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising shame, and hath sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Hebrews 12:2, ASV (emphasis added)

The Process and The Sweetness

Jesus is not offended by our process. He welcomes our hearts into His throne room, whatever they look like. I am thankful for my hard times with God, and in life. I am thankful for my raw questions, and even my lack of faith at times. These things keep me coming to Jesus. The more I seek Jesus in my struggling, the more I get to taste the sweetness of His presence.

His grace never dies. His love is always enough. He is the same yesterday, today and forever, and I can trust that He’s got this. That He’s got me. In the process of bringing my whole self to Him, He grows my faith.

But even more satisfying than seeing my own faith grow, is that I get the privilege of sitting at His feet. The glory of His Presence is not just for Kings and Queens, but for the broken, the ashamed, the lost and the hungry.

You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.

Psalm 16:11, ESV

Dear Friend,

I invite you to come, just as you are, sit at the feet of Jesus, and taste the sweetness of His presence.

"but God..." Story, approval, value, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Approval: Looking to God for Our Acceptance and Worth

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 11, 2018January 13, 2019

So often, we find our identity and approval in the things we do. We even believe this to a point of completely depleting our energy. However, our true acceptance comes from God. We can find rest in Him.

I had just wrapped up a conference for local ministry teams in our area, was managing a small staff team to oversee the kids ministry in our large and growing church, and in a season of solo parenting while my husband was working out of town. I was nailing it. “We couldn’t have done it without you,” was both the mantra and drug of choice in my life…

Blindsided

I didn’t see it coming.

I probably should have, but in what felt like the blink of an eye I went from a high-capacity leadership position to curled up in the fetal position, barely able to leave my bed to get to the bathroom.

What had happened?

In a blazing flash of light, I had sparked and burned out.

Naturally, I assumed a week of vacation would solve it.

It got worse.

I took a leave of absence and saw a counselor. Surely a couple of weeks would be the cure…

It wasn’t.

I was sent to so many doctors and specialists, looking for a way to “fix” me. But none made a difference.

I became broken and devastated.

Desperation

For months, I did my utmost to drag myself out of bed, to the office, to the dinner table – trying to will myself to get back up again. I cried out to God in desperation, begging for his strength and provision.

Then, an uncomfortable truth crept in: they were managing without me. I felt disposable.

My self-worth plummeted as I sank into the reality that not only did I have nothing left to give, but the energy I had spent to the point of exhaustion wasn’t even what God had asked of me.

How had I arrived at this point, believing my worth was based on what I did for others?

Why was this not only a health crisis… but also an identity crisis?

Where had I gone wrong?

Earning Approval

If I’m honest, this idea – this view that who I am is based on what I do – wasn’t new. From the time I was young, I believed I needed to earn love and approval…

Teachers praised positive role models.

Parents approved of good grades.

Church groups applaud volunteerism.

I could earn approval and love through hard work and being good.

Our “Best” For Approval

Honestly, in most seasons of life, this mentality worked for me. I’m an energetic person. I love being involved. I’m a natural leader who can’t help myself from jumping in when a project needs rescuing. Much of my life I’ve felt fully alive bringing my best to the table.

But not always…

There have been times when I’ve asked for help, just to find rejection. Times I’ve struggled in ill-fitting roles and asked for wiggle room, just to find patronization. Times I’ve vocalized my concerns, just to find condescension.

I’d learned to move on – to be the solution, but never the problem. To push past pain, smooth over rough edges and paste a bright smile on my face, determined never again to feel the pain of being dismissed. Until that pain burst out of the edges and took over.

Crying Out

In that season, I begged God for strength…

He said, “rest”. (Matthew 11:28)

I pleaded with Him for healing…

He said, “be still”. (Psalm 46:10)

I wrestled with Him. Asking for a way to be meaningful, productive…

He said, “not yet”. (Psalm 37:7)

And in my complete helplessness, God drew near.

He pointed out women who had my complete respect, and whose productive years were far behind them. I respected them for their courage and their character, not their accomplishments. He said I could be the same.

He pointed out my insane pace of life that didn’t allow me to hear His voice and invited me to new rhythms where I could live out His truth:

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Matthew 11:30, NIV

God clarified my calling – and for a season it was simply REST. Then He added, “LOVE your family”. Now, He’s adding TESTIFY. He bade me “let go of feeling responsible for everyone else”. He’ll carry the world on His shoulders – I can let go.

I’d love to tell you I have found complete healing from ever again finding my worth in my accomplishments. Unfortunately, I’m not sure that’s true. In fact, I suspect I’ll always need reminders of this truth. But I do know, as I walk this journey of healing, I’m finding a newfound freedom and joy in living as His daughter instead of just His servant (2 Corinthians 6:8). His masterpiece instead of just His tool (Ephesians 2:10).

True Identity

So don’t worry! You are more valuable to him than many sparrows.

Matthew 10:31, TLB

I’d like to think I’m the only one with faulty vision. I’d love to believe women everywhere are getting this right, and I’m alone in my brokenness. But, the more I look around me, the more I see the lies this world gives us are too easy to believe. So, here’s the truth Sisters…

Our home in its perfection and imperfection is not a true reflection of our worth.

Income does not dictate our level of success.

We are not alone (Deuteronomy 31:6).

We are His beloved daughters (1 John 3:1).

Our children are not our net worth.

We are loved (Zephaniah 3:17).

We are valued (Matthew 10:31).

Our ministry is unrelated to our favor with God.

We are invited to rest (Exodus 33:14).

We are created in His image (Genesis 1:27).

Be blessed by these truths.

Kirsten Sandland Kroeker is a Jesus-lover in pursuit of the abundant life Christ offers and finding God’s rest in the midst of burnout. She loves the Canadian wilderness, Chai tea lattes, board games, and a great novel.

You can read more from Kirsten at kirstenkroeker.com You can also connect with Kristen on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, and via email: kirsten.sandland.kroeker@gmail.com

obedience, fight, flee, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Flee: When it is Time to Run Away Instead of Standing to Fight

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 10, 2018January 13, 2019

Certain situations in life beat us down, overwhelming us with discontentment. How do we know if we are to stand and fight, or if we are to flee?

Growing up in a Christian home, I was taught to love and be kind to other people. I was also taught to be a fighter. Not with my physical strength like my brothers were, but with my determination. I was taught to never give up and to fight for what I wanted. This determination still serves me well, but there have been significant moments in my life when running away from a fight actually brought peace.

Permission to Quit…

Before my son was born, my husband and I “birthed” a coffee shop. It was a dream that was becoming a nightmare. We were working non-stop. Up before the sun rose, and to bed long after the sun had set. And instead of making money, we were going deeper and deeper into debt. But we were fighters. And to give up meant that we had failed.

So we persevered, even after I became pregnant. Giving up the business never entered the conversation. It was simply not an option. Then I had a baby, along with postpartum depression. Thankfully, someone who loved me gave me permission to quit. It was an incredibly freeing moment. There was still a lengthy process to fully unload the business, but the weight started to lift at that moment.

Obedience Over Acceptance

For eight years my husband and I lived in Chicago. Many people feel this is a wonderful place to live and raise a family. For us, it was very difficult. We never really felt we fit there, and Lord knows we tried. We tried to invest in church, friends, a house. And we were involved with church, and we did have wonderful friendships, and we did make our house a home. But, I kept finding myself looking at job ads in other cities.

For so long I felt guilty about this. I felt that I should learn to be content with where I was and that I should just accept that this was my life. Until I realized that maybe we weren’t supposed to stay there. Maybe I was discontent so that we wouldn’t stay. It wasn’t giving up. It was letting go.

Do I regret starting the business? No. I know it was part of the journey I needed to walk. There were people we ministered to, and relationships that were developed that exist to this day. Do I regret living in Chicago? No. It was an intense, long season that taught me about people, myself, and how to be thankful. I was obedient in starting the business, and I was obedient to flee from it. We were obedient to go and live in Chicago, and we were obedient to flee from it.

Fight or Flight…

In the Bible, there are times God calls followers to stand and fight. In the book of First Samuel, chapter 17, we read about David and Goliath. We all know this story. Here is this young man, the baby of the family, going up against a massive, strong, arrogant warrior. David knows that he, on his own, does not have the strength to fight this man, but God does. He defeats Goliath and gives all glory to God! David was obedient to stand and fight.

“I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts… This day the Lord will deliver you into my hand… For the battle is the Lord’s, and he will give you into our hand.”

1 Samuel 17:45-47

There are also times God calls followers to run and hide. In the book of Matthew, chapter 2, we read about an angel telling Joseph to take Mary and young Jesus, and flee to Egypt because King Herod was setting out to destroy Jesus. They didn’t even take time to plan their trip. They just up and fled in the middle of the night. Couldn’t God have simply struck Herod down like Goliath? Certainly, but He didn’t. Joseph and Mary were obedient to run away.

“Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt…”

Matthew 2:13

If we find ourselves in destructive places that suffocate our souls, it is alright to ask the Lord if we are to stand and fight or flee to Him. Click To Tweet

Stand or Flee…

If you find yourself in a destructive place that is suffocating your soul, it is alright to ask the Lord if you are to stand and fight or run and hide. Maybe you are to fight in the name of the Lord and glorify God through this battle. Or maybe you need to protect yourself, and/or your family, and run to a place of refuge; even if it is just for a period of time to rest and recover.

Maybe you have just needed someone to give you permission. Permission granted.

All Scripture from the ESV Bible

blessings, control, depression, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, mentor, ministry

Reins: Relinquishing Control to The Lord Who Blesses Us

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 9, 2018January 13, 2019

When we give the Lord the reins to our life, we relinquish control. And as we let go, He leads and guides us into His blessings.

Sometimes, when I pause and consider my life, I am amazed at how the Lord has blessed me. It definitely has not always been this good. But the more that I’ve relinquished control over the reins of my life, the more the Lord has given me a life seemingly tailor-made just for me. The blessings that flow from Him are incredible.

The Blessings

I have a loving husband whose heart is inclined toward Jesus. Over the years, I’ve seen the Lord do a tremendous work in his heart. Today, he is truly the man I always hoped I would get to walk through this life with. We are blessed with two beautiful children. They are caring, healthy, smart, curious, and uniquely talented.

Then there are the ways in which the Lord has healed my mental and physical health, giving me abundant energy and the ability to physically do the things I desire. And that’s not to mention the creative pursuits I get to be a part of: writing for this blog, making jewelry as a tool for ministry, singing and making music with my husband and worship team at our wonderful church, creating yummy, healthy recipes, and making our house a cozy home where peace and beauty rest.

But it hasn’t always been this way…

I Hated My Own Life

For many years, I honestly hated my own life. Riddled with depression and anxiety, I could not imagine a time when I would want to live–much less a time when I would feel so blessed in so many ways! But despite my many blunderings and missteps, the Lord has guided me to this pleasant place.

A man’s heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps.

Proverbs 16:9

Handing Over the Reins

I’m so appreciative of, and humbled by the life I am getting to live. It is not always perfect, but it is good. And I know who gave me this wonderful life. It’s not of my own making. I’m living a blessed life because about a decade ago, I handed the reins of my life over to Jesus Christ.

For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother’s womb.

Psalm 139:13

The Lord has been leading and guiding me since before I was even born. But for so many years, I was fighting against who He was and who He wanted to be in my life. I was striving to maintain control over my own path. And He let me exercise my free will. I jerked away from Him to try to find my own way. But my road was paved with regret, shame, selfish ambition, anger and the like. I was literally heading for destruction in the form of depression and suicide.

Only Part of the Picture

Still holding onto anger and rebellion against the version of Jesus that my mom had exposed me to, I could not trust that Jesus truly was who the Bible says He is. In a nutshell, I was raised in a very isolated, strict, fundamentalist, religious atmosphere…

My mom was trying desperately to hold fast to all of the “rules” of the Bible. So, an intimate relationship with Jesus was not her priority. A carryover from her wounded past as an orphan was the belief that if you don’t follow the strict rules, your life will literally be in danger. Outside of the rules, severe punishment awaited.

Biblically, there is some truth to this notion of the rules–outside of God’s grace and mercy, we really aren’t safe or protected from evil. But that’s only part of the picture that the Bible offers. It’s as if my mom had only torn out the pages about fear. About the fire and the brimstone. And that partial picture is what she revealed to me and my siblings.

Somehow, the loving invitation of the gospel–the parts about Jesus’ love and grace and mercy–were on pages that had gone missing. Sadly, Mom missed the invitation that so many believers miss. The invitation to trust that we are loved by a good Abba; a good daddy who leads and guides us perfectly if we’ll trust Him.

Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance?

Romans 2:4

Gathering Up the Shards

When I was out from under my mom’s authority, no longer hitched to her wagon so to speak, I ran as far and as fast as I could. Away from anything that smacked of Jesus, the Bible, or Christianity. With unbridled determination, I grabbed the reins to my own life. Thinking I could mold it, shape it, and ultimately force it into what I wanted it to be, I forged ahead.

But no amount of ambition, perfectionism, self-sufficiency, and determination could save me from the wall I was about to hit. And I thank God that He let me hit that wall. Because when I broke into a million pieces, Jesus was there, lovingly gathering up the shards and putting them back together again. He was refashioning them into something beautiful. Into the Hope that He had known all along.

He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.

Psalm 147:3

Reined in by Love

I’ve learned to relinquish the reins through seasons of both hope and despair. And through it all, I’m learning that I am the most loved, protected, and at peace when I rest in the security of my Father’s love. When life is hard or scary, and I don’t know what to do, I can run to His loving arms. He has reined me in with His love.

When we learn to relinquish the reins of control, we can find rest in the security of God's love. When life is hard or scary, and we don't know what to do, we can run to His loving arms. He reins us in with His love. Click To Tweet

Today, I’m happier and more fulfilled than I’ve ever been. And I know that He has even better things in store for me in the years to come. But none of this would have been possible if I had held fast to the reins of my own life. When we relinquish control to God, He sets us free. Yes, beloved, we lose control over our lives, but the path is smoother, and the blessings far greater when we are trusting Him!

He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.

Matthew 10:39

Are you still holding onto the reins in a certain area of your life? Have you experienced the reining in of His love?