The Comparison Trap

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As I read the email that introduced the new team member to our faculty I sulked in total unworthiness as I soaked in every word. Prestige. Successful. Accomplished. A grand introduction. My insecurities began to rise. For as long as I can remember I have struggled with feeling like I am enough. And comparing my worst with someone else’s best is exactly what I do best.

Can you relate? Why didn’t I get this grand introduction when I was hired? Why isn’t what I’ve accomplished enough to be listed in an email to our entire team? Why am I not enough? These were all lies running through my head. Because you see friend, I am enough. And just in case no one has told you lately, so are you. Whether you are a full time working mom, an exhausted college student, retired with an empty nest, or in my case, almost 30 with a husband, two fur babies, and a part time job, you are enough. Exactly where you are.

I can remember when I was a child, I was constantly striving to get good grades to please my parents. And when my brother, three years younger than me and smart enough to help me with my homework, brought his straight A report card home, I would cringe. I anxiously shared my report card lined with B’s and C’s with my parents, and found myself in constant comparison with my brother. I knew he would always be better than me in school. And that I would never “measure up” to him. The fact was, it just came easy to him. And it didn’t for me. I had to work really hard at it and accept the fact that our brains just functioned differently.

As I entered my adult years, I found myself trapped in the same game. Always striving to be the best or better. The problem wasn’t that I was trying to be better, it was that I was always striving to be better than someone else, when in fact I just needed to stop wrestling with the truth. The truth that, God so uniquely designed me as a one of a kind and that by being myself alone, I am completely enough.

Comparison asks, “Am I really enough?”

But God says, “Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” Luke 12:6-7

You see, we have always been enough. Broken, abandoned, addicted, tainted, rejected, sinful.. we are still enough, because God says we are. When I read this scripture I think about the magnitude of care that Jesus has for us. Just imagine that for a moment. Let the depth of His love for you sink in. Because He says you are worthy. When we find our worth in Jesus, worrying about if we are enough in this world won’t matter. Jesus just has to be enough for us. We have to stop living in a constant state of striving for human satisfaction and embrace our purpose filled impact on eternity. When rejections and comparisons and insecurities rise, we have to ask ourselves where our worth lies. Have we clothed ourselves in truth or are we being blinded by the comparison lies.

A couple of years ago I became so fed up with comparing my life to everyone else’s that I just stopped. I began to speak Gods truth over myself every single day. I put on my armor in the battle to defeat the enemy of comparison to get to the truth that I am enough. My mantra became “Embrace your race!” It’s something I still tell myself everyday, and something that I encourage other people to do. It reminds me to run this race in life in my own lane, to be my very best self without worrying about measuring up to the runners beside me.

I can never be you and you can never be me. When we choose to wake up and embrace who God made us to be, it gives Him the glory and allows us to walk in complete freedom and experience His true love for us and who He designed us to be.