This past week kinda got away from me. I didn’t take the time to write, and honestly was just not motivated to do so. This happens every so often, so I was just going to do something light-hearted. But that will have to wait. It just doesn’t seem right. I don’t feel light-hearted today. I actually feel very, very heavy. I feel heavy about loss of life this week. I feel heavy that there is so much hurt, anger, and division in our country. I feel heavy that my brother-in-law lost his father. And I feel heavy that 2 little boys lost their mom this weekend.

A classmate of mine from college whom I was in the dental hygiene program with, has lost her battle with cancer. It was all so sudden that it has left many, including myself, trying to catch up. What happened? How did this happen? Why did it have to happen. It makes me weep and want to scream.

Two and a half months ago she was performing in a local production of Steel Magnolias. Two months ago she was celebrating her son’s 9th birthday. A month ago she shared this on Facebook:

CANCER….for those who’ve wondered & those who’ve already known….yes it’s what I’ve got! The thing about cancer is, it causes a person to experience MANY different emotions but it also causes you to really reflect on life. One thing I’ve learned is that my family is so incredibly loved by SO many people that I can’t even begin to explain how that makes me feel!
And, so whatever happens during this journey…..I am blessed beyond measure because I know that I AM the daughter of a KING that is NOT moved by this world!!! There is nothing that happens in my life that HE doesn’t already know about. I shall not fear because HE goes before me! HE is the Great Physician & I know that HE will protect me….HE has great plans for me! My JESUS has me in the palm of his hand & HE knows exactly what I need when I need it!!!! And for that I am thankful!! So…It’s ALL GOOD y’all.

And today, she is gone.

She was not a close friend, but her death has hit me incredibly hard. The tears just won’t stop. Without Facebook, I probably would not have any clue what her life was like, or that any of this was happening. But I do know that she was an incredibly bright, loving, and kind person. She was when she was a part of my daily school life, and seeing the response of her death, I know that her influence has only increased over the years. Now, she is not just in the “palm of his hand” but truly in the arms of Jesus. What a beautiful image.

She was loved greatly, because she loved greatly. She is absolutely the daughter of a King who is in complete control. We do not understand His ways, but we can trust Him. We may not like the outcome, but we can rest in His peace. I agree with her, it is ALL GOOD!

I feel so much pain for her parents, her husband, and her boys. I know they are in shock, overcome with grief, and wondering how they will make it through each day. There is no advice, there are no words, to ease the pain they feel. Jesus says, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” The comfort will come, but for now, just mourning. Deep, gut-wrenching, painful mourning.

It’s so easy to get caught up in day-to-day things. It’s not that those things don’t matter, or that the Lord is not using those things to teach us, or encourage us, or heal us. But there are seasons in life that our perspective shifts. For this precious family, suddenly nothing else matters. I’m sure they are not caring about what they are wearing, or what they need to get done this week, or who is running for president. They only know the love they feel for this incredibly special woman and the hole that exists in their lives now that she is gone.

For today, I have no deeper message to share. Only that I wish to weep with those who weep (Romans 12:15).

xoxo

About the author
Rachael
Rachael Smith motivates women to break free from the lies they have believed and live a life of freedom, teaching that God's truth allows us to be who we are created to be. She has a passion for women, and a willingness to walk through the hard stuff with them.

This calling on her life led her to begin, and grow a nonprofit that works with young women who have aged out of foster care. Rachael believes we all have the ability to redeem the past and change the future.

Comments (08)

    1. Thank you for such beautiful words about Jodi. I was also in the cast of Steel Magnolias and much like the parts we played I had known Jodi from the time she was born because of my close friendship with her parents. She played Shelby , I was Clairee. She was outstanding in her performance and never complain of all the extra work we put into this. I will be forever grateful for this time we shared.

      1. Sheri, what a wonderful memory you were able to make and share with her. I know so many will be feeling the loss of her life.

  1. We lost an acquaintance to cancer this week too — a well-loved, glittering woman who is leaving behind an unfillable hole. I’m weeping with you, Rachael — weeping, but praising too because they are both in the arms of Jesus.

  2. Rachael, I’m Jodi’s mom Judy Hazelwood. It’s 12:52am July 10, 2017. I’m re-reading your post from last year. How beautiful & precious were your words. Thank you!
    This time last year I was holding Jodi in my arms fighting to hold back all my many tears & emotions, (she didn’t want us to cry in front of her). Watching my beautiful daughter cling to life. As we lay there I just kept saying “momma’s here & I love you.” Thinking how long can she hold on, she died @ 3:30 Sunday morning July 10, 2016. Jodi was such a strong incredible beautiful young woman who was the core of our family. Her daddy affectionately called her “Queen”. Her younger brothers looked up to her & miss her so. She was a second mother to them both. Oh, they fought & didn’t see eye to eye but they loved her & miss her so.
    Her husband & boys are missing her something terrible. The loss they’ve had to endure is almost unbearable at times.
    Later this evening we are having a balloon release at 6:30. We will honor our girl with red balloons for her ruby birthstone. July 26 will be her 2nd heavenly birthday. If you have a moment say a prayer for us.
    Please lift us all in prayer as we start on year 2 without our sweet beautiful Jodi. ❤️

    1. Oh, Judy. Thank you for sharing these final moments of her beautiful life. Once again, tears continue to fall. My heart aches, and I cannot even imagine the anguish you feel. I will continue to pray for your sweet family.

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