prayer

life verse, scripture, God's word, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, ministry, encouragement

Life Verse: Discover Personal Meaning in God’s Word

Devotionals, Stay SaneApril 19, 2018June 28, 2019

What is a life verse? Do I need a life verse? Am I the only one without a life verse? This discusses the what, why, and how to discover God’s personal message for us through His word.

It seems like everything we do at our church asks us to list our “life verse”. Baptism – life verse; New Comers lunch – life verse; Starting Point sign up – life verse; Awana – life verse; Join the church – life verse. You get it.

But here is the thing….I don’t have a life verse. Yes, I read my bible quite a bit. And I have a fairly good working knowledge of God’s word and love all the history contained within its books. I know that it is a road map of mandates that will help me see my heavenly Father one day and spend eternity with Him. There have been many times in my life when I needed guidance and the verse was there to help me through. No life verse though. So I began a quest for one.

Step one: What the heck is a life verse?

After reading many sources, it seems that a life verse is just your “go to” when you need reassurance of God and his position in your life. It is a verse that speaks truth to you no matter what else or who else crowds your life. The truth that God loves you, Jesus died for you, and the Holy Spirit can guide you through the trials of earthly life.

As with any question I start researching, I found a lot of information. Other blogs about how to find a life verse, lists of other people’s verses, and some cautionary discussions.

When I am struggling with something, I like to see all the sides. Take it apart and really look at the basic reasons for its existence. I think that God want us to be more conscious of His word. He gave us these stories to guide us through this life so we can join Him in the next. Being so familiar with His work that I can quote it chapter and verse seems like a good use of my time and will ultimately help me in my quest to be the best reflection of His light possible.

Step two: Choose some verses to “try on”.

I was light hearted with this at first and took a quiz. It did give me a pretty good verse:

Trust the Lord with all; your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6, NIV

But as I accepted that the quiz did a really good job giving me a verse that totally fit the criteria of a life verse, I realized something. I forgot to pray about it first. So I talked with God:

Father,

This idea of a life verse keeps coming up. I have no idea what to say and it keeps coming up. Guide me to the verse that You know will be a cornerstone in my life. Help me discern Your meaning and show me how You want my light to shine for You.

love,
me

Then I opened my Bible. I used my copy of The New Oxford Annotated Bible. I landed on The Wisdom of Solomon 18:1, “But for your holy ones there was very great light. Their enemies heard their voices but did not see their forms, and counted them happy for not having suffered.”

Problem is, Protestants don’t include this book in their Bibles. Catholics and Orthodox religions do. I’m not really clear on why, though that is now a question in my research log: A list of questions I don’t know the answer to, but would like to know more about.

Not one to give up too easily, I went and got another Bible. After a few flips through, I landed on one that spoke loudly:

You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your being, and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: You must love your neighbor as you love yourself.

Matthew 22:37-39, CEB

But I really wanted a third option. I was really focused on the idea of the trinity here. So I pulled out my bible app and found the verse of the day. I admit, I read through a few before I found one that called out.

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.

John 16:33, ESV

Step three: Pray and read the verses daily.

I am still on this step. I am asking God to speak His truth into my life. My problem seems to come down to this: I need all three of these verses in my life.

If I’m discouraged or unclear about God’s path for my life, Proverbs 3:5-6 seems like God’s answer. For those times when I am not being nice or am impatient with those around me, Matthew 22:37-39 helps me find my footing in God’s light again. And when life gets hard John 16:33 is full of encouragement.

I had hoped to have an ANSWER to the question, what is your life verse? by the time I was done with this post. I haven’t found it yet. However, it has dawned on me that the idea of a life verse doesn’t have to be permanent. It can be fluid and change as life changes and your faith grows. That thinking has made it easier for me to acknowledge that I haven’t found “THE VERSE” for my life yet, but the journey to find one (or three) has been enlightening and has caused me to be reflective of my life and God’s purpose in it, which I think is the point.

A life verse doesn't have to be permanent. It can be fluid and change as life changes and your faith grows. Click To Tweet

What is your life verse (or three)? Share in the comments.

Aaron Burden

exposure, vulnerability, relationships, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, ministry, encouragement

Exposure: Enriching Relationships With Vulnerability

Devotionals, Stay SaneApril 15, 2018September 8, 2019

Exposing our hearts can be uncomfortable. Especially when it involves our spouses, friends, God, and even ourselves. Vulnerability has the ability to enrich our relationships and the results are beautiful.

Vulnerability. There’s that word. I shiver when I hear it and cringe at the thought of opening up. I need the comfort of my couch and a warm cup of coffee; STAT!

Over these last few weeks, God has pushed me to learn one specific lesson: exposure. One thing that is incredibly difficult for me to do is speak my mind. To verbally expose feelings I have. There are two reasons I have difficulty in this area. One: confrontations make me uncomfortable. Two: I NEVER want others to feel uncomfortable because of me.

So why is “exposure” my lesson from God? It might be that 8 years is the exact time it takes for me to confront real issues within my marriage. Maybe it’s because of the adult friendships I am learning to navigate. Or, I’m finally understanding the importance of being vulnerable with myself. Perhaps, my spiritual growth in the Lord is drawing me towards a posture of exposure. I’m certain, these all apply.

Types of Vulnerability

Marriage Vulnerability

One thing “they” don’t tell us about marriage: we will sooner or later be completely exposed. Yeah, we all know about physical exposure, but no one tells us our insides are completely laid bare for our spouse to see. This is something extremely uncomfortable for me.

When you are living every day of your life with someone, it’s inevitable they will see sides of you that no ones else sees…

My husband hears my true voice, sees my true reactions, and witnesses my most vulnerable moments. He sees the food I eat, the shows I watch, and when I have a booger hanging out of my nose. He’s seen me cry uncontrollably and that one time I punched something. Okay, maybe a couple times.

Because he sees all this, I feel the need to keep some things hidden. Something! Anything! I feel like I need to keep some sort of dignity. Or, that thing that is just too painful; it’s mine.

Relational Vulnerability

In any relationship, there is hurt. In my experience, pain comes most intensely when I’ve been unguarded, only to be rejected. Sometimes this happens instantly, but mostly this is a damage over time effect. Meaning, we slowly allow others a glimpse inside. Then, wham!! Which feels like complete betrayal.

My gut reaction if someone hurts me, is to walk away or distance myself. The flight response is strong in me. I build those walls, create boundaries, and mask my feelings. I hold on tight; they are mine.

Personal Vulnerability

I’m not sure about you, but I also build borders to keep myself away. Kind of like I’m refusing to be honest with myself. It’s uncomfortable to go there; to push through self-inflicted pain and allow healing.

Being vulnerable with ourselves, is to be completely raw with honesty. To acknowledge our part in the pain. It’s mine. No one else can see it, so why should I have to be brutally honest? Yeah, that’s not super fun for anyone, but it’s vital.

Spiritual Vulnerability

My past is so filthy, my sin too great, my road so dark…. I’m not sure what makes me think this is all mine. If I’ve truly given my life to God, all of it is His. Every dirty, sinful moment is used for His glory. It’s called testimony.

However, I often find myself trying to hide from God. If I have to endure one more probing of the Spirit, I may just implode. Not really, but we all know there’s a lesson to learn when we are vulnerable with the Lord. Most times, I’m a child and I fight against lesson learning.

My past is so filthy, my sin too great, my road so dark... If I've truly given my life to God, all of it is His. Every dirty, sinful moment is used for His glory. It's called testimony. Click To Tweet

Responding Vulnerably

So how do we overcome? We can all benefit from practical application. We need to know what to do. We need to let go of the “mines” to strengthen every meaningful relationship we care for…

Humility

Saying “I’m sorry” is so incredibly vulnerable. It proves we are human. It proves we are NOT perfect (gasp). We hurt the people we love, the God who created us, and even ourselves. I have this rule: if you feel sorry, just say it. It shows you are thinking of the other person’s feelings, apart from their words. Also, repentance is the key to our relationship with God.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves

Philippians 2:3, NIV

This one is easy to apply to our relationship with God, but what about our marriages? What about our friendships? How often do we kneel with our spouses or start a coffee date with a prayer? Do we pray for each other face to face? I find it easy to pray for others, but shy away from praying for things I know I need help with.

Here are my directions: Pray much for others; plead for God’s mercy upon them; give thanks for all he is going to do for them.

1 Timothy 2:1, TLB

Scripture

Another easy one to incorporate in our walk with God. Maybe a little easier to have Bible time with our families, but what about our friendships? Do we approach times spent together with bible studies and scriptures close to our hearts? We should tackle issues and problems with the Truth of God.

All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

2 Timothy 3:16-17, NIV

Alone Time

I find this most easy with my husband. Others find alone time with the Lord easiest. I find it most difficult to spend quality, one on one time with a friend. Mostly because…children. I would say, focus on a relationship where you know this is lacking. Even alone time with yourself (self-care).

What then shall we say, brothers and sisters? When you come together, each of you has a hymn, or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation.

1 Corinthians 14:26, NIV

Working/Creating Together

I often forget that my ability to work and create comes from the Lord. When I say forget, I mean I don’t invite Him to help me or be a part of it. Allowing my husband to create with me, or see an unfinished work of art is completely vulnerable to me. The same is true in friendships. My creations are very dear to me (whatever it is) and I feel exposed showing others.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Colossians 3:23-24, NIV

Common Ground

In almost all my relationships, salvation is a common ground. Testimonies are meant to be shared. My testimony is growing. God is shaping and molding it. I believe, with all of my heart, that my testimony glorifies Him…as long as I’m obedient and share it.

I will praise you to all my brothers; I will stand up before the congregation and testify of the wonderful things you have done.

Psalm 22:22, TLB

I urge all of us to evaluate how we can actively utilize vulnerability to strengthen and enrich our relationships. I know, without a doubt, our obedience to the Lord’s design, will create beautiful, fulfilling friendships.

wayne dahlberg

Tragedy: Standing Firm through Grief and Suffering

Devotionals, Stay SaneFebruary 25, 2018June 28, 2019

Tragedy leaves us overcome with grief. How can we keep standing, praising, and trusting? Is God even there? Does He even listen to our cries?

There was another school shooting. It rocks me to my core every time I hear about children in school not being safe. As a teacher, and mother, I know that this is my worst nightmare.

I remember Columbine. God has had miracles come from that tragedy. At one school where I taught, we took part in Rachel’s Challenge.

I have this theory that if one person can go out of their way to show compassion, then it will start a chain reaction of the same. People will never know how far a little kindness can go.

Rachel Scott, victim of Columbine High School massacre

Her family loved her and remembers her by trying to stop people from being left out, bullied or ostracized in the hopes that they never feel the need to pick up a gun and kill.

I remember Virginia Tech. There are now much better warning systems on all college campuses to alert students to danger. And as the mother of a college student I am grateful for that.

I remember Sandy Hook. There are not enough tears to cry for that senseless act. The babies that died that day and the adults who shielded as many as they could will forever haunt my dreams. But that community came together and supported each other in such amazing ways.

Now I have to say I remember Parkland, Florida.

So where is God in the middle of all this madness? Does he really want his children to suffer? He has to be here somewhere. He has to have a hand in this somehow. After all, He promised he would never abandon us. We cry out, “BUT WHERE IS HE?”

Grief and Praise

In times like this I return to Job. Everything was taken from him within a few moments. His servants and sons dead. His livestock stolen or killed. And what does Job do…he grieves and praises God.

When Job heard this, he got up, tore his clothes and shaved his head to show his sadness. Then he fell to the ground to bow down before God and said, ‘When I was born into this world, I was naked and had nothing. When I die and leave this world, I will be naked and have nothing. The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away. Praise the name of the Lord!

Job 1:20-21, ERV

Horrible things happen. God doesn’t always intercede. I can’t tell you why. I just know that there is never a moment when He isn’t with us.

Standing Through Tragedy

As the story of Job continues we see that Satan is telling God that humans will not stand with him when tragedy strikes. They will turn their backs and blasphemy His name. But God has faith in his children and tells Satan to do his worst, but to spare Job’s life.

Satan put sores all over poor Job, he was grieving, he was in physical pain, he sat in ashes and used broken pottery to scratch at the sores. But his friends came and sat with him to offer comfort.

Then they sat on the ground with Job for seven days and seven nights. They didn’t say a word, because they saw he was in so much pain.

Job 2:13, ERV

Job does cry out eventually. He begs God to end his torment and let him die. He questions God, “Why was I even born if this is what You had planned for me?”

How many times have we done that? Questioned our Creator? I fully admit to asking him “Why?” and being angry when I didn’t get an answer.

Are You There God?

Most of Job’s friends and family weren’t much better. His wife tells him to curse God. His friends say he has to have been up to no good. They thought, “God is paying you back.”

Not true. God is there in the tragedy holding our hands, lifting us up if we let Him, but never pushing us down. He can use these times, just like He did with Job to show us how He is always there. We must trust in Him to see us through.

Job is blessed to have a great friend who will speak truth to him and who loves God wholeheartedly. Elihu tells Job, you are not innocent, no one is. But he tells the friends they can’t accuse someone of something when they have no knowledge of it. They cannot blame God.

Job, God is not only powerful, but he is fair.

Job 34:17, ERV

He does not respect leaders more than other people. And he does not respect the rich more than the poor. God made everyone. Any of us can die suddenly, in the middle of the night. Anyone can get sick and pass away.

Job 34:19-20, ERV

The Answer to Every Question

God, Himself, then enters the picture. He reminds Job that He is the creator. He has made everything, and everything exists because of God. God then tells the story of Leviathan in Job 41. If we see Leviathan as Satan we can see that God is telling us that only He can control Satan. He is a deadly enemy and we must arm ourselves with God and His Word. Only with His help can we escape the clutches of Satan.

Job and his friends repent and pray to God. God forgives them.

When these moments of tragedy happen we can’t rage against God or blame Him. God loves us. He is our Father and Creator. Find a friend who can help you seek truth and God. We all know that evil exists. Bad stuff happens, but faithfully accepting that our Father is there in the tragedy will help ease the suffering.

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Facing God’s Truth

Now here is the hard part about tragedy. We have to acknowledge if we played a part in it. This could be a blind eye that was turned, a cultural norm that goes against God that we have let slip by, a friend we weren’t true to, or a warning we ignored. Yes, there are times we didn’t play a part, but just as often we are complicit because we let society dictate its own mores. Humans are weak and flawed. God is not. We have to be the friend who stands up and tells the truth, no matter the consequences because we know that God speaks through truth.

Dear God,

Please open our eyes to Your Word. Help us align ourselves with You and put more faith in You than in the world. Let us be leaders of the Light of truth that comes from being Your followers. Thank You for guiding us through tragedy and never leaving our side. Give us the courage and wisdom to speak Your will.

Love,

Are you facing your own tragedy?

We would love to offer our support by praying with and for you.

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Lent: Focusing On the Lord Through Fasting, Prayer, and Service

Devotionals, Stay SaneFebruary 13, 2018June 28, 2019

During this season of Lent, let us focus on the Lord, and His truth. Through fasting, prayer, and service, we align our hearts with His.

Dear God,

Help me share Your good news with others. Let Your light be reflected in me, and through me to others. Give me the right words and stories to touch the hearts of those You know need it most. Help me make unexpected miracles for You.

Love,
me

This post started with the basic idea to write about Lent, and then I got lost in a sea of research about what Lent is and its history. I am really good at research, but I can easily go down a rabbit hole of questions and answers that lead to more questions. Next thing I know it’s been two days and I haven’t written the first word for this post.

So I stopped and centered myself with the opening prayer.

I started with the question…

What is Lent?

It is a high holy time in the life of the church that lasts 40 days (not counting Sundays). There are 3 major components to the days of Lent: fasting, prayer, and service. The Lenten season begins with Ash Wednesday and ends either the Thursday, Friday or Saturday before Easter (depending on the denomination). Mardi Gras, or “Fat Tuesday”, is the day before Lent begins. Historically, Christians used up their extra food, especially sugar, yeasted flour, and fruits that they had in their pantries in preparation for a time of fasting.

Fasting

Why fasting? Jesus gave His life for us. The ultimate sacrifice. We Christians try, through fasting, to pay homage to that sacrifice and acknowledge that we are all unworthy and fall short of the glory of God. During periods of fasting we should focus on this truth.

In the bible people fasted from food, but today many Christians give up something that they enjoy as a fast – technology, one kind of food or drink, secular music or something that they love to do for example. Last year, I didn’t give up anything, I added something – written prayer. Everyday during Lent and most days since, I have written my prayers down.

Prayer

Then my small group read Mark Batterson’s The Circle Maker. That study poured gasoline on the fire God had started burning in my heart, just a few months beforehand.

It has literally changed everything about my life. I am happier, more whole, and more in love with this life God has graced me with. God laid a road before me and all I had to do was walk it. No, it’s not always easy, but talking with God isn’t always hard either. I don’t like writing down my sins. That is a really hard thing to do, because you have to take responsibility for it when you write it down. On the other hand I always feel better once I lay my burdens down.

I also started writing my prayers every so often on Facebook – when the Spirit lead me. That simple act encouraged many of my family and friends, who in turn encouraged me. Then my friend Rachael, who started this wonderful blogging ministry, offered me the opportunity to write here on Oh Lord Help Us. I see all of these experiences as God’s hand working in and through my life right now. It is why I say I am having a love affair with my savior!

Service

So this year for Lent I want to take this love to the next level. Which brings me to the idea of service. I want to pray for you and with you. God has blessed me immeasurably this year. Let me share that with you and encourage you in your life.

Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on Earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father who is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

Matthew 18:19-20

I am feeling led by God to work toward being a prayer warrior. If you have a burden to share or a shame to lay down and want someone to pray for you and with you, consider leaving a message in the new Prayer section. Also think about sharing your joys and triumphs so we can rejoice with you.

…rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing steadfastly in prayer;

Romans 12:12

Finally…

There is a favor I want to ask of you. Pray for us at the blog. We could use your love and support as we reach others for God’s glory.

And we know that to them that love God all things work together for good, even to them that are called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

God’s guiding light is sure to shine through this Lent season.

All bible verses come from The American Standard Version.

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eberhard grossgasteiger

love-letters, desire, commitment, God, Jesus

Love Letters: Expressing Our Desire and Commitment to God

Devotionals, Stay SaneDecember 10, 2017June 28, 2019

Coming to know the Lord in deeper ways, it is natural to express our love to Him. Writing our prayers as love letters expresses our desire and commitment.

Have you ever received a love letter? Maybe in elementary school, the kind that said “check yes or no”? From a first boyfriend that included some attempt at romantic poetry? Or your fiancé or spouse that said how much they love you and couldn’t wait to be with you again because you make their life better? My husband and I used to exchange these types of emotional, gooey, heart-felt letters when we would spend time apart. They would make me feel so warm and special, and still do when I look back and reminisce over them. I still love him so much that I can’t imagine a day without him in my life, even after more than 20 years of marriage.

Love Letters: An Affair with the Creator

Recently, I have started a new love affair that surpasses all of that. This love affair is grander than all of those other lovely, beautiful, essential loves because this love affair is with the Creator of all the others. With all of my heart singing and shouting, I proclaim: “I am in love with God!”

Dear friends, let us love one another, because love comes from God. Whoever loves is a child of God and knows God.

1 John 4:7

I have always thought of myself as a Christian. I have gone to church, prayed, read the Bible and even talked with others about my beliefs. But recently I have finally begun to understand Agape love – the love of God for man and of man for God. Not just understand it, but feel it. The enormity and pure emotional connection that God has laid out to you and me is awe-inspiring. No one loves us like our God. He loves us before we existed and that love only multiplies.

For God so Loved the world that He gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life.

John 3:16

My husband, children, family, friends and students have all held pieces of my heart and I’ve doled out an equal piece to God. Seems reasonable, or it did to me. But I’m seeing now how much I’ve been missing. God GAVE me all the other relationships. Without Him, none of the others matter because they don’t exist. He loves us so much, He gave you and I a heart to love people. Why shouldn’t we love Him the most?

We love because God first loved us.

1 John 4:19

Love Letters: A Glimpse of God’s Love

About a year ago I started writing my prayers down. I did this as a way to be more intentional about my prayers and as a way to thoughtfully consider what I wanted to say. If it sounds technical and clinical, it was. Like a check list, I would make sure I had told God what I was thankful for, confess at least one sin, ask for forgiveness, and then ask for one thing for the world (peace, an end to hunger, for safety).

Looking back at it now, I see how clueless I have been in my love and understanding of God. God was right there for me though.

What we see now is like a dim image in a mirror; then we shall see face-to-face. What I know now is only partial; then it will be complete as God’s knowledge of me. Meanwhile these three remain: faith, hope, and love; and the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13:12-13

He took my meager attempts at communication and started talking to me, presenting opportunities to have conversations with Him that have grown my love immeasurably.

May the Lord lead you into a greater understanding of God’s love and the endurance that is given by Christ.

2 Thessalonians 3:5

First He put new friends in my path that loved me before I loved them. He showed me His heart through their compassion and love for each other. We have read and studied His word together and every time I see these people I feel God’s presence.

Then he started putting books in my path that spoke to my heart and pushed my head out-of-the-way: Present Over Perfect, Shine, Hurt Road, She’s Got Issues, and The Circle Maker. These books all have been instrumental in my newly awaked love.

There is nothing that God loves more than people who are at home with Wisdom.

The Wisdom of Solomon 7:28

Love Letters: Intimacy with God

Finally, God has opened a life line of hope and joy in my life that I have always searched for. I have always wanted to feel His presence, but quite frankly haven’t except in the rare moments that I would call out from a place of brokenness and sorrow.

This hope and joy has come through prayer. But not just any prayer, love letters. I write God a love letter almost every day.

Dear God,

Thank You for loving me. I need Your love today to be my best self. Help me to hear Your desires so that I can reflect Your love and passion to those around me. I love You! Help me to love others the way You love me. Speak to my heart. I need to step out in faith, believing that You have me tight in Your arms, so I can never truly fall even if I fail. Help me remember to move toward Your miracles.

Love,

Me

Be ready for God to answer you.

He said, “God loves you, so don’t let anything worry you or frighten you.” When he had said this I felt even stronger and said, “Sir, tell me what you have to say. You have made me feel better.”

Daniel 10:19.

Maybe it will be with a feeling of calmness, words from a friend or family member that come at just the right time, or a Bible verse that just pops up. He loves you beyond all words – let Him hug your heart today.

All scripture used is from the Good News Translation.

If you are interested in the books mentioned, please consider purchasing them through these affiliate links. There is no extra cost to you, and a small portion goes to help support this ministry:

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John Jennings

but God… loved

This is where our stories change.
Believing the truth that you are fiercely loved by the Creator changes everything.

Friendship: A Practice in Sacrificial Love

Devotionals, Stay SaneDecember 3, 2017September 8, 2019

Worldly standards on friendship can hinder our ability to be a Godly friend. In our quest to become the “truest” friend, we often stretch our personal boundaries and limits to the point of breaking. The Bible offers a multitude of advice on friendship and why sacrificial love is key.

I have the worst habit of telling new, potential friends that I am a “bad” friend. I began believing this idea when I started comparing what my friendships looked like with other friendships.

Surely a good friend should be able to drop anything at a moment’s notice. Isn’t a true friend able to carry the other through any darkness with strength and perseverance? Aren’t you “supposed to” go shopping, do lunch dates, talk on the phone?

I figured, since I wasn’t able to follow through on these standards 100% of the time, it meant I was not a “good” friend.

Well, that’s a load of junk.

Friendship: The Honest Truth

In my experience, stereotypical norms discourage Godly friendships from thriving. The world standards of “girl-friends” doesn’t always align with my personality type. I am not one for getting excited about shopping dates. I sometimes cringe at the thought of play dates. Socializing leaves me feeling exhausted. Typically, I get heavy after long conversations. Not by the subject matter, but by over analyzing my words and interactions.

Most people cannot commit to answering the phone WHENEVER the call comes; work, sleep, and alone time are extremely important. Many of us can say that we will not ALWAYS make that coffee date; life happens and money is sometimes tight. We cannot ALWAYS keep it together while the other is going through a valley; pretending to have it all together is tiring, and quite frankly, insincere.

So, are these the reasons friendships go awry? Does lack of perfection cause us to feel guilt and give up?

Friendship: Where We Go Wrong

When thinking back on fizzled out friendships, I was surprised to find they were completely within my control. Instead of enriching relationships inside my own God-given strengths, I shook them off. I compared and belittled what I brought to the table.

Having a successful relationship, doesn’t usually fit into obvious standards. Feeding into the lie that we have to be like all the other friendships, is where we go wrong. God created us to be exactly who we are: unique. Thus, our friendships will be unique.

You use steel to sharpen steel, and one friend sharpens another.

Proverbs 27:17, MSG

God ordains friendships knowing that each person has what the other needs. When we try to operate outside of this knowledge, we mess it all up. When we refuse to allow God’s love to fill in the empty spaces, our friendships die.

Friendship: What the Bible Says

The Bible emphasizes love as the greatest way to be a friend. When we come together IN love, TO love, we are committing our hearts to serving the Lord.

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.

1 Peter 4:8-9, NIV

Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

Romans 12:10-12, NIV

Jesus spoke the most significant advice on friendship…

This is my command: Love one another the way I loved you. This is the very best way to love. Put your life on the line for your friends. You are my friends when you do the things I command you.

John 15:13-14, MSG

Friendship: The Promise

Jesus’ sacrifice gives us the greatest example of how to truly be a friend. Laying down our lives doesn’t necessarily mean our hearts stop. Sacrificing our lives looks like prayer. It looks like following through, being trustworthy, showing respect. Sacrificing ourselves resembles grace in the midst of pain; love in spite of selfishness. Love looks like 1 Corinthians 13.

I have come to terms with the fact that I will always be in a state of progress. I will never, ever be a “perfect” friend because I am not Jesus. Understanding and accepting these truths, has made me realize, I’m not a “bad” friend just because I’m not a “perfect” friend. I may not commit to every coffee date, phone call, or outing. But, I can promise, from the depths of my being, that I will love fiercely.

If we can become comfortable with who we are and what we have to offer, I believe we would see less broken relationships/friendships. Striving to love in friendship, honors God more than striving to do and be all the things.

If you have found this inspiring, share the encouragement…

Pretending to have it all together is tiring, and quite frankly, insincere. Click To Tweet

Don Ross III

Adventure: Leaving What is Safe for Abundant Life

Devotionals, Stay SaneOctober 15, 2017September 8, 2019

Adventure means leaving our comfort zone. It can be uncomfortable, but often what is on the other side is the abundant life.

Just before I woke I had a chilling dream. I was running through a banquet hall attempting to elude a man pursing me. I felt sick as I realized there was nowhere else to run and I had to fight. Finding some knives on a nearby table I hurled them at my attacker. He was able to deflect them with plates or large metal bowls which he would in turn launch in my direction. We ended up in hand to hand combat; I was sorely outmatched. He pinned me against a wall where he slowly stab me in the thigh. I suspected that he thought the blow was mortal since it was one of his signature moves. He lowered me to the ground and walked away triumphant.

The scenes changed and it was dusk. Outside in a harvested wheat field, I was leaning against a wooden fence. Wondering if I looked pale or if I would soon lose consciousness I looked down at my feet expecting to see blood, but there wasn’t any. A glimmer of hope sprung up that perhaps my wound just needed to be mended. Birds started singing as I made my way back to the main house and I knew I wasn’t going to die from the stabbing, but I would have the limp for life.

That was when my tweeting birds alarm fully pulled me from my dream.

Adventure

It has taken me a seriously long time to grow into my name.

Emily: industrious, disciplined, striving.

It is difficult for me to stay on task, so striving certainly resonates with me. Somewhat recently I have scratched the surface of being more self-disciplined. This is because two years ago this weekend, my husband got a job that moved our family 600 miles away from my hometown. And stuff. got. real.

I didn’t used to be an adventurer; I stuck with what felt safe. But when we uprooted our family, I had two choices: become a recluse in one of the most densely populated cities in the U.S. or find community.

We hadn’t even begun to settle in our new home when the heavens opened up and dumped three feet of snow. The blizzard gave us the opportunity to meet several of our neighbors while we were out shoveling every two hours. I hadn’t met that many people on any street we’d lived on before! I had a lot of free time on my hands after our kids were in school. Out of my normal comfort zone, but strangely fearless, I signed up for a ladies’ bible study at our new church and met some friends. Life really took off from there.

Leaving What is Safe for Abundant Life

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

Hebrews 10:23, ESV

My dream captured an accurate picture of my life as a Jesus follower. Historically I’ve run from conflict; but some battles I must fight. Usually they’re messy and rarely do you escape without some wounds and lasting scars.

A lot of change has occurred since our move. I took a job in ministry and have developed intimate community. But our family has also incurred some blows from the enemy. At times, I feel like I’ve prayed all the prayers, read all the books, said all the things…and the enemy still advances. So, I turn and fight – expecting the hits Satan thinks will wreck me – confident that my life is in God’s hand.

I turn and fight... confident that my life is in God’s hand. Click To Tweet

What adventures have led you to an abundant life? Let me know in the comments below!

Do you feel like you are striving? Strive to be better, not different!

If you have found this inspiring, share the encouragement…

Iker Haro

How Do You Feel About Prayer?

Stay SaneSeptember 11, 2016

I wanted to title this post, “How to Have All Your Prayers Answered in 3 Easy Steps” and it was going to go like this:

Step 1: Be thankful for everything.

Step 2: Only ask for intangible things.

Step 3: Follow everything up with “if.”

And even though my alternate title sounds like I’m being facetious, I don’t necessarily disagree with those three steps. But let me back up and tell you a bit more of what I struggle with and why.

Nearly 2 decades ago, when I was in college, I was fervent in prayer. I prayed with passion and I prayed specifically and I prayed for everything. I even considered myself a “prayer warrior.” I guess this was opposed to a “prayer pacifist.” Not really sure, but that may better describe me currently. It was after college that difficult life struggles hit. And my faith was shaken. And things that were once simple were not any longer.

After that, whenever I heard people talk about prayer, and that their prayers were answered, I felt jaded. Why weren’t mine? Did I not pray fervently enough? Did I not sacrifice enough? Were not enough people praying? And I found myself beginning to change the way I viewed prayer.

I accepted that the Lord has a plan, and even though I play a role in it, it is not about me. His plan is to bring all people into a deeper relationship with Him. And if His plan involves hardship in order to accomplish that, who am I to complain? Who am I to say He messed up or is wrong? But in accepting this, I no longer felt the need to pray for anything specific. No longer could I bring myself to ask for healing, or for a job, or for my house to sell.

My prayers began to become more conversational. That’s more of what it should be, don’t you think? Not a checklist of things that the Lord needs to take care of, or a wish list for a holy genie. I began to pray for things like peace, comfort, endurance, and wisdom. Or for sin to be removed from my heart. These are things that I know the Lord desires for all of us. I don’t know if He wants to solve [whatever it is that I am struggling with at the moment], but I know that He wants me to know a deeper dependence on Him. These are prayers that I can pray confidently.

I also don’t want to feel like I can manipulate the Lord with my prayers, otherwise I might take credit. I don’t want to pray for a life with no troubles, because that was never promised. I want a life where I am fully His. But…I also don’t want to go through troubles!! I’m not a crazy masochist! And so alas, this is difficult for me to resolve within myself.

This past week, as I’ve been fighting off the feeling of discouragement, I became overwhelmed with all that needs to be done in the next 2 weeks. I wanted to pray that God would send someone to buy our house and have this stress taken from me, but I just couldn’t seem to ask for it. So I reached out to an amazing group of ladies that I meet with regularly to pray on my behalf. And then I had a long talk with the Lord that went something like this:

“Lord, You know what I’m struggling with. You know that we need someone to buy our house. You know that I’m stressed, so give me peace Lord. But what if You don’t want someone to buy our house yet. What if the person You want to live here isn’t ready? And maybe it’s not even about me, maybe it’s about them. Or maybe we were wrong to buy this house, and we are paying the consequences. What if there is something I need to learn? I don’t want to rush through learning what You have for me. I know that You are going to take care of us. So why am I even perplexed? Why am I wanting this so badly and feeling discouraged? [Here I went quiet, listening…] Ahh! I just don’t want to be bothered! To be honest, I’m just tired of keeping my house clean, and I’m mentally drained with trying to figure out how to pack when we need to leave things behind.”

Then the Lord brought to mind all the ways that He has provided. He has provided for us to purchase a small home that we can afford without having to sell our current home. Our family won’t have to be apart as we wait for the house to sell. He has given us a school for my son going into K4 that is not requiring us to pay until he starts in October. On the day I was discouraged, a friend texts me out of the blue to check on me. Through our church Facebook page I met a lady who moved to where we are going last year, and has offered for her and her husband to help us unload the truck. I’ve been blessed by friends that are willing to hang out and play with my kids so that I can pack. Oh friend! He is taking care of me!! And I can absolutely trust Him!

Before any of this began, I could hear Him saying, “Your time of rest is coming to an end, do you trust me?” And I responded with a “yes,” but I was fearful of what exactly that would entail. Now He is telling me, “Don’t be fearful, I will take care of you.”

Now, back to the steps to have your prayers answered.

Step 1: Be thankful for everything. Trusting that all things are for His pursuit of our hearts.

Step 2: Only ask for intangible things. Of course the Lord wants for us to feel peace and for us to know Him better.

Step 3: Follow everything up with “if…it’s Your will.” When praying for specifics, it is done with open hands, knowing that His ways are higher than mine and that I don’t have all the information.

Yes, I still struggle with praying for specific things, but I’m learning. I’m learning that when I pray for things that are out of my control, it is emphasizing how much I am dependent on the Lord. I know many of you are passionate about prayer, and I would love to hear your heart on this. How do you feel about prayer?

xoxo