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Surface: Allowing The Lord to Deep Clean Our Hearts

DevotionalsSeptember 8, 2019September 8, 2019

When it comes to our hearts, a surface cleaning won’t suffice; the Lord is in the business of deep cleaning in order to set us free.

The other morning, in a bit of a rush, I accidentally knocked over a big glass containing a fruit smoothie I’d just made. Thick, dark purple liquid splashed all over the counter, blanketed the stovetop, and promptly drained down into that deep, dark abyss–otherwise known as the small crack between the counter and the stove! Needing to get out the door, I hastily wiped up all of the visible mess on the surface. But I knew that upon my return, the goopy, gelatinous puddle in the abyss would require some serious deep cleaning.

The hidden, nasty mess…

Later that evening, after the kids were in bed, my husband and I settled in on the sofa to watch a movie. It was shaping up to be a nice, relaxing evening…until…dun dun dun… Cue the cheesy horror film music…reent reent reent! I remembered the hidden, nasty mess awaiting me in the kitchen.

For a moment I entertained the notion of postponing my deep cleaning job until the morning. After all, getting all that gunk out would require pulling out the stove, perhaps vacuuming, mopping, and who knew what else.

But I had a sneaking suspicion that by morning, there was a strong possibility my kitchen would reek. So, I got off the couch and got to work. I’ll spare you the dirty details, but suffice it to say, the scene I encountered underneath and behind my kitchen stove was disgusting…borderline disturbing!

To think, at least twice a day I’ve been cooking meals in that room, and all of this filth was lurking there, just below the surface! It’s a wonder my family is still alive! Ok, so perhaps now I’m overexaggerating a hair…

Downright dirty…

As I knelt down and scraped up those nasty globs of who-knows-what off of the floor, I thought about the parallel between my cleaning and the cleansing work God does in our hearts.

When it comes to our hearts, the Lord is not satisfied with a cursory surface wipe. In fact, when He does an important work in us, the process can get downright dirty. As believers, in order to truly be clean, we simply can’t stay on the surface where things feel orderly and comfortable.

Friends, we need to be willing to open up the cluttered cabinets of our minds, pull back the dusty drapes shrouding our dreams, and expose the grimy residue clogging our hearts. This means that sometimes our walk of faith requires getting down on our knees and delving into the muck and mire of deep spiritual cleaning.

Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess. Thou blind Pharisees, cleanse first that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also.
Matthew 23:25-26

Sometimes our walk of faith requires getting down on our knees and delving into the muck and mire of deep spiritual cleaning. Click To Tweet

Surface cleaning…

But admittedly, too often, surface cleaning is the way I tend to keep my natural house and my spiritual house. I like for there to be order in my home, so I keep clutter to a minimum. I don’t leave things in places where they don’t belong, and I don’t allow messes to accumulate. But I confess that it’s not very often that I really and truly deep clean my house.

Polishing the spiritual side of this coin, we can see that it looks similar. I’d wager to say that, as believers, most of us try to keep a tidy, sanctimonious outward appearance. We attempt to maintain some kind of daily quiet time routine. Perhaps we listen to worship music in the car or post scriptures and uplifting memes on social media. Most of us regularly attend Bible study, small group, or a weekly worship service.

Scratching the surface…

But in a sense, don’t all of these religious routines constitute forms of mere maintenance cleaning? Albeit good practices to be in, taken together, these activities barely scratch the surface of the deeper spiritual walk that’s required of a true believer.

But how often do we turn our hearts and minds over to the Lord to really allow Him to scrub, and cleanse, and purify us? Scripture strongly warns against the danger and hypocrisy of this kind of surface cleaning.

Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For ye are like unto whited sepulchers, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness. Even so ye also outwardly appear righteous unto men, but within ye are full of hypocrisy and iniquity.
Matthew 23:27-28

Skeletons in the closet…

Now, thankfully I didn’t find any dead men’s bones under my stove! But spiritually speaking, when I confess to the anger, hatred, and judgement, that I’ve harbored in my heart, I definitely have hosted some skeletons in my closet.

Had I never spilled my smoothie, I probably would not have thought about cleaning under and behind my stove. Meanwhile, dust, mold, and bacteria, would have continued to fester there, to the detriment of my home’s air quality and our family’s health.

Often, this is the way spiritual problems reach our radar. Maybe our “spilled smoothie” looks like an argument with a loved one where anger and harsh words spill out of our mouths–exposing deeper roots of bitterness that have taken hold inside. Or perhaps we see someone getting praise or recognition for the same kind of thing we would like to do, and thoughts of jealousy and envy rise up in our spirit.

A spiritual makeover…

Friends, I hate to say it, but all of us have an ugly, dark abyss that needs deep cleaning, and this time I’m not talking about the crack between your countertop and your stovetop. I’m referring to the shadowy recesses of our hearts where our unhealed wounds, sin, and shame reside. Those hidden places where we fear that God’s grace can’t, or won’t, reach. But the Lord sees the exact spots on our hearts that need His thorough cleaning and healing.

And no amount of outward adornment–pretty clothes, makeup, half-hearted smiles, or even well-rehearsed Bible verses–can hide our spiritual blemishes. Sisters, we must be willing to ask the Lord to do a full-on deep cleaning in our hearts. Yes, this makeover is likely to hurt our pride, expose our weaknesses, and destroy our false sense of security. But, ultimately letting go of our dirt–jealousy, shame, failure, and fear–allows us to truly be clean. To be beautiful. To be free.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:23-24

Have you resorted to surface cleaning spiritually? Does your heart need a deep clean?

*All scripture references are from The King James Version of The Holy Bible.

Annie Spratt

cleansing, forgiveness, Oh Lord Help Us, spiritual growth, women of faith, Christian mentoring

Cleansing: The Lord Desires to Repair Us Physically and Spiritually

Devotionals, Stay SaneJuly 31, 2018September 8, 2019

As temples of the Holy Spirit, we need the Lord’s full cleansing. We can stay clean by filling ourselves only with things that nourish our spirit.

If you’re like me, there are problems in your life that you have tried to ignore or tolerate for far too long. We can struggle along with these problems; we can limp through half-hearted attempts at a resolution. Often we ping and pong back and forth between hope and despair that our problems will ever fully be resolved. But if we’ll let Him, the Lord brings us to a point where we finally cry, “Mercy!” That is the point when we choose to face and deal with the problem once and for all. It’s a hard place. But it’s such an important place to get to. It’s where we relinquish our control over the problem and fully put it into God’s hands. Ultimately, it’s the place where we find His physical and spiritual cleansing.

The roots of the problem…

I’ve gotten to this place in my physical health, and the things I’m learning apply to my spiritual health as well. For years, I have struggled with stomach problems. The earliest roots of the problem wind their way back to my preteen and teenage years when I experienced an onslaught of emotional trauma. Over the course of my adolescence, my parents divorced; my dad died of a massive heart attack, and I bounced from one home to another, eventually living with six different foster families by the time I graduated high school.

Throughout all those emotionally unsettling years, my stomach was very upset. Seemingly out of nowhere, I became lactose intolerant; I had severe acid reflux and heartburn. And throughout the years, the problems gradually intensified. I was diagnosed with IBS. More and more foods began to bother me, causing severe abdominal cramping, skin rashes, headaches… You name the gastrointestinal symptom, I’ve had it. Now, before this post starts to sound like a script for all the possible side effects on your average pharmaceutical commercial, let’s take this analogy in a spiritual direction!

I need a cleansing…

I need an overhaul, a cleansing. I’m tired of limping through life, just coping with this problem that has plagued me for decades. And I’m not willing to settle for a partial solution, some band aid prescription that will just tame the symptoms temporarily. I want to get down to the root causes of what’s going on in my system and work to repair and heal all that I can. So, this the point where I turn it over to the Lord.

I know that He can help me to heal, and He’s provided everything I need to heal in His creation. It’s just a matter of my committing to the process and being unwilling to accept anything less that than a full recovery. As such, I’m beginning a six week dietary cleanse, a detox, a resetting of my gut, with the expected end of healing. So, here’s the spiritual tie in. Hopefully it provides some “food for thought.”

What we put into ourselves matters…

With food, when we’re hungry, we can reach for the cookies, or we can opt for a nutrient dense snack. And the effects in our body will reflect the choices we make. When it comes to our soul and spirit, what we feed ourselves matters too. In every moment, there are choices we can make. When I wake up, do I reach for my Bible and journal and get still before the Lord? Or do I grab for my cell phone with my calendar and my to do list? The first choice feeds my spirit with the fortification I will inevitably need throughout the day. The second choice fills me with stress and anxiety over all that I need to accomplish.

When I have a brief span of peace and quiet in the afternoon, do I intentionally reach for an inspirational book or encouraging blog post? Or do I absentmindedly scroll through social media, comparing my life to everyone else’s and feeling like I don’t measure up? When I’m tired at the end of a long day, do I reach for the remote and binge watch some reality tv show where other people are pursuing their creative dreams? Or do I work on a song I’m writing or watch a sermon from a speaker or pastor I like? All of these little choices matter because they have immediate and cumulative effects in my mind, my soul, and my spirit. What am I feeding my spirit?

What? Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20, KJV

Filling my temple…

If I’m filling my temple full of worldly wisdom, carnal desires, and earthly comparison…I’m bringing things into the temple that are not holy and acceptable to the Lord. When I renew my mind with the Word of God, nourish my soul with uplifting music, and keep my mind on things above rather than on things below, I’m filling my temple with things that are life-giving. I’m building my temple up rather than tearing it down. And if what we put into ourselves matters, we know that what comes out will reflect what we have put in.

A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.

Luke 6:45, KJV

Removing the blockages…

I’ve learned something very interesting in my health journey: Even if I’m eating very healthy foods, if I still have underlying issues in my gut, I can’t even absorb the good nutrients that I’m trying to get from the healthy food I’m eating. So, until I fully heal my gut, no matter how healthy I’m trying to be, I will still suffer from the same symptoms.

The spiritual side of this coin looks very similar. Even if we are trying to put the right things into our spirit man, if we still have underlying sin–unforgiveness, resentment, anger, envy–the sermons from church and scriptures from the Bible can’t fully sink in. We must remove the blockages in our spirit that prevent the Truth from fully penetrating our heart.

Just as a detox diet or a cleanse is meant to clear out the garbage lingering in our physical system, when we realize we have unaddressed sin, we have to turn our temple over to the Lord for His complete cleansing. Click To Tweet

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

1 John 1:9, KJV

Keeping the temple clean…

And once He has cleansed us, we have to be vigilant to keep our temples clean. So, when I finish this six week reset of my gut microbiome, the goal isn’t to then go out and gorge myself on all the junk food I’ve been craving. The point is to identify and eliminate the foods that hurt me and to only reintroduce the foods that are healthy and nourishing to my system.

And so it goes with our faith walk. We need to pay close attention to the things we’re watching, the relationships we’re maintaining, and the thoughts we’re thinking. If they have been toxic to our faith, we have to identify and eliminate the things that don’t serve us. And once we are fully cleansed, we are better equipped to handle the more difficult things in life because we’re approaching them with a clean heart. Let’s follow the Word’s prescription for the kind of pure, clean diet we need to feed our spirit:

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Philippians 4:8, KJV

What kind of diet have you been feeding your spirit lately? Are there things that you need to be cleansed of?

Kumiko SHIMIZU

forgiveness, grace, Oh Lord Help Us, Christian, women, ministry

Clean: Understanding Hurts and Extending Forgiveness

Devotionals, Stay SaneMay 14, 2018September 8, 2019

When we understand the past of people who have hurt us, we are more capable to extend grace. We are able to wipe their slate clean with forgiveness.

When I was in grade school, I loved it when my teacher would choose me to wipe the chalkboard clean at the end of the day. There was something almost magical about that simple physical process. What had been a murky mess—rows of math tables, diagramed sentences, partial erasures, and a lingering cloud of dust—could be wiped completely clean. What remained was literally a new, clean slate for the next day’s instruction.

As believers, we can glean a simple yet profound message here: the Lord’s forgiveness is a complete work, with mercies that are new each day. In Isaiah we read:

I, even I, am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, and will not remember thy sins.

Isaiah 43:25, KJV

And in the Psalms we’re reminded of just how far away He casts ours sins:

As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.

Psalm 103:12, KJV

An Ever-Present Need

Being a mom of two young kids has done wonders in teaching me about the need for mercy and forgiveness. From meltdowns, to accidents, to intentional misbehavior (and those are just on my end!), to sibling rivalry, and the list goes on… We have an ever-present need for grace, mercy, and forgiveness in our home. Many days I feel as if I’m working at a deficit in my parenting bank. But if I’m operating in the red, that is precisely the time to turn back to the blood of Jesus. To let His strength perfect me in my weakness; to allow His forgiveness to flood my soul; and to let Him father me as I mother my children.

Misuse of The Rod

It has been hard for me to wrap my head and heart around the notion that God is a loving dad who gently guides me and forgives me when I make mistakes. My slowness to internalize this truth stems from the lies I learned and the wounds I sustained when I was very young. I was raised in a strict, legalistic, and abusive home. Repentance and chastisement were heavily emphasized, but somehow forgiveness seemed to be forgotten. If it’s the Lord’s goodness that draws us to repentance (Rom. 2:4), it was my mom’s misuse of the rod that drove me further from her, and for many years, further from God.

I remember one day when I was probably four years old. I had dropped a jar of cream that shattered and spilled all over the kitchen floor. Positive parenting classes I’ve taken would likely recommend a patient response to this kind of scenario. Consider whether a task is age appropriate for the child; acknowledge when something is an accident; enlist the little one’s help to clean up the parts of the mess that are safe for her to tackle. Patience, mercy, kindness. A Christ-like response.

But my mom had torn a page from a different kind of book and claimed that it was from the Good Book. She began shouting at me; dragging me out to the dark mudroom where she would whip me repeatedly on my backside with a leather strap. She slammed the door behind her, leaving me alone, scared, and wounded in the dark.

Tiptoeing on Eggshells

This was the typical pattern. I would misbehave somehow or accidentally break or spill something, and the hammer would come down. Hard. I would be “disciplined”, which usually meant abused, and a silent treatment would ensue. The painful welts on my body or missed meals were nothing compared to the punishment inflicted by Mom’s cold shoulder of emotional isolation.

I would then have to tip toe on eggshells and placate my mom until her storm of anger passed. Rarely, if ever, was there a loving conversation about how my misbehavior could be changed or what a reasonable consequence would be if I committed the same offense in the future. Instead, I would be forced to say sorry and accept the blame for whatever had happened. I can’t ever remember a time in those early years when Mom asked me to forgive her for how she had treated me.

On Pins and Needles

My mom died nearly three years ago. I recall a conversation I had with her a few years before she died. In the past, she had told me that she was raised in an orphanage from age seven until she graduated high school. But she had never gone into detail about what she had suffered there.

During her years at the orphanage, Mom found herself in the unfortunate position of being under the tutelage of a strict and abusive house mom named Ms. Hupp. Mom had harbored a deep fear of and hatred for this woman. She said Hupp would wake up all the girls before dawn, barking orders at them to get dressed, make their beds, straighten their belongings, and report for duty. Duty entailed meticulously hand scrubbing floors, washing walls, helping prepare meals, and various and sundry other tasks that she seemed to create just for the sake of keeping all the girls busy. Mom said Hupp’s constant scrutiny and criticism kept her on pins and needles.

Connecting the Dots

As she described Hupp’s mistreatment, I began to connect the dots to my own experience of how Mom had treated me when I was little. Young women sometimes joke that one day they will probably become their moms. Well, Mom had grown up and become like Hupp. Without her own mom in the picture, she had learned from the only mother figure she knew. As Mom spoke about her hard heart toward Hupp, I could identify with her anger, but in a way, my own heart was softening toward my mom. Mom told me how the Lord had helped her to finally forgive Ms. Hupp. She said He had let her see Hupp’s wounded heart so that she could forgive her. As I write this, I can say that I have forgiven my own “Hupp” too.

Wiping the Slate Clean

After many years, my mom asked me if I could ever forgive her for all the ways she had mistreated me. When I told her that I had already forgiven her, I could almost see a weight lift off her. For so many years, she had borne the heavy shame and regret of her abusive behavior. Her abuse drove my dad to divorce her and fight for full custody of me and my siblings. Her abuse made it impossible for us to return to live with her when my dad died. But the pain Mom inflicted also drove her to her knees, to sincerely repent to the Lord and seek His forgiveness.

Although she knew she had been forgiven, she still struggling with the shame of the hurt she had caused. Somehow, she still needed to hear that I had forgiven her. Although we can seek the Lord’s forgiveness, we also need to humble ourselves to ask forgiveness of the people we have wronged; and we need to extend forgiveness to those who have wronged us. When we do so, we are free to fully love and be loved.

And when you pray, make sure you forgive the faults of others so that your Father in heaven will also forgive you. But if you withhold forgiveness from others, your Father withholds forgiveness from you.

Matthew 6:14-15, TPT

Is there someone in your life whose slate you need to clean with your forgiveness? Is there someone whose forgiveness you need to seek?

Although we can seek the Lord’s forgiveness, we also need to humble ourselves to ask forgiveness of the people we have wronged; and we need to extend forgiveness to those who have wronged us. Click To Tweet

Keilidh Ewan

Learn From Others. Be Encouraged. Repeat.

Be Healthy, Save, Stay SaneJanuary 5, 2015March 20, 2016

I think it is so valuable to surround oneself with positive, encouraging, and challenging people. And then to learn from them. There is so much that we can learn from others. When we moved to South Carolina a year and a half ago one of the first things we did was join the YMCA. It has had a tremendous positive impact on our family. And part of that is because I met Chris my first week being there. Right away she made me feel so welcomed and talked with me like she had known me for years. Over the next year she challenged me physically and nutritionally to be stronger and healthier. And it’s her fault that I started competing in triathlons! While she is being an encouragement to others, she is a wife, mother, health coach, fitness intstructor, and business owner. This is definitely someone that I want to learn from, and she was generous enough to let me interview her so that you can learn from her as well.

What all are you juggling at the moment?

I’m teaching fitness classes which is an ongoing thing. Also building my business which includes planning and customizing online detox programs, updating the website, marketing, and making connections with other local business owners with a simular passion. And for the past year I’ve been studying functional nutrition online at Replenish which is part of Holistic Nutrition Labs.

What does a typical day look like for you?

I start with a workout either on my own or teaching a class. Then it’s a couple hours working on the computer building the business. Once it’s 3 O’Clock, it’s all about the kids! Picking them up, completing homework, going to activities, and cooking dinner. And of course mixed in there is grocery shopping, and cleaning. I don’t have a house cleaner yet!

We can’t do it all, and have to sacrifice certain things at times. What do you sacrifice?

Well, I’ll tell you what I don’t sacrifrice. I don’t sacrifice my workouts, or cooking for my family, and my kid time. What I do sacrifice is building my business. There are so many ideas that I have and want to do, but I have to say it’ll come later because there is not the time for it right now. It’s hard sometimes though, because I get real excited and I’m passionate about it and want to try something, but then I am overbooking myself and I get stressed and end up taking it out on the family. It’s a constant going back and forth and trying to find and keep that balance.

Is your house clean right now?

It’s picked up, but there is dust on the baseboards. My husband appreciates organization, so to honor him I keep it picked up. But my junk drawer is junky!

Do you have any money saving tips?

I shop around different grocery stores. Mainly I go to Trader Joes, Publix, and Wholefoods and shop whatever is on sale and in season. This means that sometimes I am meal planning on the fly. Also I will buy in bulk for things that I know we will use, but if I’m making a new recipe I will go to Earth Fare to their spice section and just buy what I need for the recipe in case I don’t like it. That way I don’t buy a whole bottle of a spice that I would maybe not use before it expired. And we don’t eat out. I’d rather spend that money on an organic meal to make at home. I guess I spend a lot of time at grocery stores!

It’s encouraging for me to know that I am not alone in this universe with wanting to do more than I have the time or energy for. It’s healthy to prioritize, and it’s okay to let things further down the list be neglected at times.

If you would like to connect with Chris (and you should) to learn and be challenged, you can visit her website at www.nourish2live.com, or on Facebook.

The Post Workout Stank

Be Healthy, Stay SaneNovember 1, 2014March 20, 2016

I have a little household tip for you this time.

As I was doing laundry this week, I got lightheaded while putting our technical workout clothes in the wash. Last weekend both hubby and I competed in races. He did the Tough Mudder in North Carolina, and I did the Carolina Marathon. I disturbed the odors that were in our clothes basket. Nast.Eeeee.

But this is isn’t a new problem. Our workout clothes reek on a regular basis. I’ve heard that it is because a different type of bacteria thrive on polyester than cotton. And apparently you can’t kills those stinky little critters. I have tried the special detergent for workout clothes. And it does seem to help, but I think it’s just because the fragrance is stronger. And it doesn’t help for long. As soon as you wear them again and your body warms up the bacteria, the stank returns.

So I looked up how to get rid of the stank. You can either dry your clothes in the sun, or use vinegar. I don’t have a clothes line, so I opted to try the vinegar route. I soaked my shorts in 1 part vinegar, 4 parts water for 30 minutes. Then rinsed them out and put them in the wash with the rest.

Verdict. Compared to some of the other items (yes, I went through and smelled our stuff-you’re welcome), it did seem to be better, but not totally gone. The only workout clothes that don’t smell of mine or either new, or from lululemon. So I guess you could pay a fortune at lululemon once, or buy cheaper stuff more often. Or stop running all the time. But that ain’t gonna happen.

My House is Clean, and That’s OK.

Parent, Stay SaneSeptember 14, 2014May 24, 2016

My name is Rachael, and I like to clean. There, I said it.

I feel like there has been a movement of sorts to stop cleaning. I have seen several articles going around the social media scene about how people (we will call them moms) are accepting that their homes are not clean because they are busy being moms and taking care of and spending time with their children. Maybe this is because there is a crazy amount of pressure out there on us women to do it all and be it all and have it all and we are finally starting to crack under the pressure and rebel in our own little ways.

I completely agree with these articles, it is alright that homes are messy. But every time I would read one and then see one (because I had to stop reading them) I would feel so offended. See, I do have a clean house. I confess. I like things to be organized and I feel more at peace when things are put away. Why was I offended? Because I felt like they were implying that because I do clean, that must mean I’m neglecting my children somehow. But that is hogwash. I spend plenty of time with my children, taking care of their needs, and nurturing them in the ways they need. Daily I cook for them, clean them, read to them, do puzzles with them, color with them, train them.

Aha! There it is! I train them! See, a couple years ago I was expressing this guilt I felt (about having a clean home) to an older lady that has a PhD and had years of experience doing social work with children. And her response was a great encouragement. She said, “What’s wrong with teaching your children to clean and be responsible?” Oh, is that what I’m doing? So I’ve changed my perspective from “I’m just OCD” to “I’ll teach my kids to be OCD.”

When my older son turned five we introduced regular chores and he started to receive an allowance. It started with just making his bed, and has grown to making his bed, setting the table, clearing the table, dusting, cleaning windows, and helping with laundry. Then he started recruiting his 3 year old brother to help and he would give him part of his money. This is how I knew I could add chores for the little guy. He’s like an apprentice to my apprentice. It’s really cool to see their teamwork. We actually look forward to doing chores. My oldest knows that if he complains about the chores, he doesn’t get paid. If he asks to be paid, he doesn’t get paid. And he doesn’t get paid for everything. Dishes, making the bed, picking up are all standard stuff. Dusting, windows, laundry gets him 50 cents a job.

This is how we roll…

Picking up: I rarely clean up after my boys. For the most part they put their stuff away on their own when they’re done. This has taken training though. In the evening, about 10-15 minutes before dinner will be done (depending on how big the mess is), I set a timer and tell them to clean up. Whatever has not been put away by the time the timer goes off gets put into a basket and they will get it back the next day. This way their stuff is picked up before dinner, and after dinner we can focus on family time and baths and reading.

Laundry: They love loading clothes in the washer and moving them to the dryer and putting them in the basket. Like they fight over it. Weird kids. With their clothes, they are in charge of the socks. They have to sort and match, great for teaching colors to the 3 year old. For the towels, I fold the bath towels, 6 year old folds dish and hand towels, 3 year old folds rags. And we have conversation the whole time. We talk about some pretty deep stuff (for a 6 year old). This is what he craves, his “Love Language” if you will. To be with me and have me listen to him is so valuable. And the laundry gets done. Bonus!

Dusting and Windows: For this I turn on groovin’ music and we dance while getting it done. I’m usually cleaning bathrooms or sweeping while he does these.

Miscellaneous: If they leave their lights on, I take a quarter. I’ve explained to them that it costs money to use electricity and if they want to waste it, then they have to pay for it.

My strategy is, once my house is clean, it’s a lot easier to keep it clean. It’s never overwhelming to me, and I usually only spend 30 minutes at a time taking care of stuff.

I’m not saying you need to have a clean house. I truly could care less what your house looks like. And I agree that houses that are cluttered are fun to go to. And I know that sometimes, other things are going on and cleaning need to be put on hold.

We all have to do what helps us be calm. Because being calm, helps us to be better moms.