Patience during a difficult season requires trusting that the Lord has greater things in store. What are you trusting God for?
For awhile it seemed like my life was moving backwards. I was 21 year old when I bought my first place. It was this cute 2 bedroom townhouse with an attached garage. Then we moved to Atlanta where we lived in a 500 square foot studio in a high rise. We gained a sweet view of downtown, but we no longer had a washer and dryer. Had to go to the basement for that. There was a parking garage with one assigned spot. My poor husband had to fight for an open place.
After that, we moved to the suburbs of Chicago. Here we lost the air conditioning and the dishwasher. Laundry in the cellar, had to go outside to get to it. But at least we could park in the driveway. Then we moved into the city. We got the AC back, but lost parking. Had to find it on the street and dig out our spot when it snowed. Still no washer and dryer, no dishwasher. Also, there was no sunshine. First floor apartments with buildings 3 feet away don’t allow for much sun to penetrate. At the next place we got the sunshine back (third floor), but lost the ac again. No ac, no dishwasher, no washer/dryer, no parking. Three flights of stairs and a newborn. Whew!
After a year and a half in that apartment, we finally were able to buy a house. An actual house! With a yard! The yard was smaller than the garden we had when I was growing up, but I was thrilled to have it. We got back the AC, the garage, the washer/dryer, and four years after we moved in we put in a dishwasher.
We did so much to that house. Complete gut rehab of the second floor. While I was pregnant. We have a picture of me five months pregnant swinging a sledge hammer busting out plaster. We finished it two weeks before my second son was born. This was a rough time physically, financially, and mentally. At one point a rat got in our house because there was a hole in the concrete of the basement. A RAT!! IN OUR HOUSE!!! Then we got busted and fined by city for doing work without a permit. There I was, eight months pregnant, standing before a judge, begging for mercy.
Difficult times…
Our 8 years in Chicago were hard. Of course there are the basic Chicago things that all Chicagoans deal with. Harsh winters that just won’t end. Traffic that moves so slow you might as well walk. People that speak harshly and are unfriendly. The permits, tickets, and fees that make you paranoid to drive your car anywhere. But we also dealt with my hubby losing his job, opening and running a money devouring business, living in crappy apartments, living through a rehab, and a rat.
I wanted to leave so badly. I cried so many tears, begging God to get us out of there. We tried so many times to get out. Once, we were seriously considering a job opportunity for my husband in Seattle. He made it through three rounds of interviews until that door was closed. Praise the Lord it was. I would have been even more miserable there. There was an opportunity to move back home to Louisville at one point that I was truly disappointed didn’t work out. When we were actually at the point where we could move, we thought we would move back to Atlanta. That seemed to make the most sense. It’s a big city with lots of job opportunities, great weather, and we still have friends there. But alas, this was not to be either.
Greater things…
The Lord had something even greater in mind. He gave us even more than what we asked for. Atlanta would not have solved all the problem that we were dealing with in Chicago. It still has a high cost of living, it still has bad crime, it still has bad schools, and of course it still has bad traffic. I didn’t know a thing about Greenville, SC before my husband had his phone interview phone for the position here. The first time either of us ever stepped foot in Greenville was when we came with the moving van.
Not everybody is miserable is Chicago. I have dear friends who live there and they love it. It’s home for them, and I am thrilled that they feel that way. There is such peace in feeling “home”. But not once in 8 years did we feel “home”. We had many moments of joy there, including friendships that will age with me. But we knew we were not meant to stay there. Even though we struggled, we knew we were where we needed to be for that long season in our lives. We knew it wasn’t time to leave yet, no matter how desperately we wanted to. Waiting is difficult.
Wait for The Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for The Lord.
Psalm 27:14, ESV
Patience
We learned that we had to be patient. And we had to wait for The Lord’s perfect timing. I’m relieved that when doors were closed we didn’t try to force them open, although I was standing there with a crowbar feeling tempted to do so. I would pray, “Lord help me feel at home!” I wanted to want to be there. Then I prayed, “help me feel at peace.” And I would for a period of time. Sometimes we are called to stand and fight (like David and Goliath), and sometimes we are told to run away (like Joseph and Mary fleeing to Egypt). I believe we never felt at home because we were never meant to stay.
It takes trust to learn patience. So if you find yourself in a situation where you feel desperate to escape, be encouraged! Trust that The Lord knows, and cares. Know that His timing is perfect. And there is nothing wrong with crying while you wait.
It takes trust to learn patience. So if you find yourself in a situation where you feel desperate to escape, be encouraged! Click To Tweet
This is where I’m at right now. The last 3 years have been such a long battle, and I’m so tired of hanging in the balance, having absolutely no control over some HUGE factors in my life. I’m such a planner, such a goal and timeline oriented person. But this storm has completely destroyed all of that, and many other parts of my life. I’ve lost so much, but the Lord has been teaching me to trust fully in Him, to be patient, and to believe that His plan and His timing are better than mine. And I’m finding that the attitude we have during these seasons of waiting are what will determine the outcome.
Oh Lady, I know it is so tiring. But I love that it is drawing you into a deeper, more intimate relationship with our Lord. I’m cheering for you!!
Wow, you’ve lived in a lot of places that didn’t have typical things that we consider basic in our society. God indeed is in control of each move, and He is able to transform our character through difficult situations.
Oh Susan, it was such a stretch out of my Kentucky-country-upbringing comfort zone!! It definitely gave me a different perspective on what I could and could not handle. And transformation is a good way to put it!
Patience is so hard for me! I want what I want and if I can’t get it, I work my hardest to get it. Needless to say, God is working patience in me big time. I keep failing the test so I have to keep taking the remedial course. My stubborn pride wants what I want;)
I believe “failing” is a necessary part of growth!
Thanks for sharing this. This is exactly what I’ve been thinking about a lot recently. Both trusting God in hard times and being patient to see a breakthrough. It can become tiring and discouraging when you are waiting a long time, or when you think that you’ve had your breakthrough but it was only a false alarm. Thanks for your encouraging thoughts.
Robert, I’m glad you found it encouraging!Keep Trusting!!