In the past week I have had two different people ask me why I started this blog. The answer: a Target commercial. That and a good friend telling me I should.
In this Target commercial there was a woman that woke up early and went to the gym, got her kids off to school, looked beautiful going into work, came home and cooked dinner, and then spent the evening playing with her children. It ticked me off! I was so angry at this commercial for putting so much pressure on women to have it all together. I may be able to accomplish some of those things, but I probably won’t be smiling at the end of the day.
Perhaps you can relate to this feeling of being overwhelmed trying to fit a mold of what you think you should be. God has designed each of us mommas to be the best momma for our children. We don’t have our friends’ children, therefore we do not need to do things just like our friends. Or even what we think our friends/actresses on a commercial may be doing.
Several years ago when I was working as a dental hygienist I had a patient tell me, “I bet you are such a good mom. You are so calm and patient.”
Hahahahahahahaha!! I’m still laughing about that one. No one who knows me well has ever called me “calm.”
But I have tried to pay attention to what things stress me, and what things stress me more (not a typo-all things have a certain degree of stress). And I choose, as best I can, to take the calmer path.
After having my third child I felt like I needed to try the baby wearing thing. Little girl was being quite fussy and I had a couple people suggest doing that. Absolutely no pressure from them. They were being helpful by providing suggestions and I appreciate that. It was worth a shot. But I completely hated it! I was more stressed, which caused her to be more stressed. You know what calmed us both down? I put her in the crib and closed the door. She would fuss for about 30 seconds and then go to sleep. And now, whenever she’s getting fussy while being held, I lay her on the floor. Immediately she is happy and cooing. The girl needs her space, just like her momma!
Mommas, Listen Up!!
You gotta do whatever your calm is! Our children need us calm, not frazzled.
Does it stress you to be tied to a schedule? Then wing it!
Does it stress you to not have a plan? Then schedule your day!
Does it stress you to dust/sweep/put away laundry? Then let it go for the next 5 years!
Does it stress you to have dust/dirty floors/clothes unfolded? Then go clean while your kids watch Wild Kratz!
Does it stress you to be home all day? Then pack up the kids and hit the town!
Does it stress you to have to pack up the kids? Then stay home!
Final Thought
The only thing that is non-negotiable is that we MUST MUST MUST love our children. And I think we have that part covered.
