Learning to be vulnerable can be scary, but the reward of living this way is great. Being open allows God to redeem us and be an encouragement to others.
This is one of the hardest posts I’ll have to write. It’s all about me. I’m not particularly fond of talking about myself, but I am an expert on the matter (sometimes). Simply put, I’m Katie! This is the most “to the point” I can ever achieve. “But who IS this Katie?” So far, I have attained the titles of wife, mother, daughter, friend. Most specifically, I am an Executive of Household Management. Majoring in the Studies of Efficiency, with a minor in Cooking Sciences and Day Planning. Seriously, I’m a homemaker. I make our home run while chasing three handsome boys (one of which is my husband).
I get through the day on coffee, wine, and my sweet friend Jesus. I adore science fiction movies and fantastical stories. I love creating and imagining. I gain most inspiration after conversations with my husband (he’s the “talker” of the relationship) and trips to the beach. Being a mom… Wow! Two of the greatest moments happened when my two boys took form (biased)! They are difficult, and confusing, and make me say the strangest phrases sometimes (I’ll let you imagine what two boys can accomplish). But they bring a beautiful level of love and energy to our home that I would never want to replace.
Now, to the nitty bits… GERONIMO…
It’s difficult for me to pinpoint one or two specific instances that started me along my journey. Most moments in my mind are not compartmentalized. It’s gray in there. However, I can say, starting at a fairly young age, I allowed insecurity to guide my thoughts. I allowed people, loved ones or otherwise, to heavily influence decisions I made and, ultimately, the way I thought of myself. I allowed negativity, of all shapes and sizes, to make their homes in my mind. Instead of a flourishing confidence, a dangerous spirit took hold of my heart. I found it easier to listen to whispers than the booming voice of God.
As you can imagine, if a trend like this continues into teen years, the outcome in early adulthood is crippling. There was, and still is, a constant battle of overcoming negativity and insecurity. Outcomes of this mindset are not shining moments in my life. I entered toxic relationships, cut off friends, passed up opportunities, ignored family, caused myself physical harm, made unhealthy decisions. I don’t look back fondly on these choices. They are ugly, and raw, and very difficult to discuss. These are the bits that are the dingiest and can push people right out the door.
However, when you turn your darkest parts over to the Lord and ask Him to make something beautiful, there is a level of vulnerability required. The gritty, nasty pieces need to be on the table to make your testimony valuable. That’s my prayer. That my continued lessons, my pain, my journey bring hope through the saving grace of Jesus. That this life will glorify God, and all that I do and say be in obedience to His commandments.
God didn’t set us up for an angry rejection but for salvation by our Master, Jesus Christ. He died for us, a death that triggered life. Whether we’re awake with the living or asleep with the dead, we’re alive with him! So speak encouraging words to one another. Build up hope so you’ll all be together in this, no one left out, no one left behind. I know you’re already doing this; just keep on doing it.
1 Thessalonians 5:9-11 (The Message)
I may not always write about new and exciting things. At times, we may get heavy and raw, but I hope the words you read will, ultimately, uplift, encourage, and wrap you with a warm blanket. Don’t like warm blankets? I have ice water. Let’s laugh and cry together. Let’s learn some hard lessons together! Let’s “do faith” together.